Melissa

These pretzels are making me thirsty

[Melissa @YouLISyouWereMe]

I could eat a good sandwich any time of the day. Meatball, ham and cheese, Reuben, you name it I’m havin it. What time is it? 5:30 in the morning you say? Sounds like sandwich time to me.

[Melissa @YouLISyouWereMe]

@nikestore My friend is native to China and she desperately wanted the Chinese New Year shoes. Her size was not offered. She is a woman’s size 6. It is fairly discriminatory considering she feels people from China do typically take smaller sizes. Can someone make this right?

[Melissa @YouLISyouWereMe]

Happy Sunday to everyone except for people who put bread in the fridge

[Melissa @YouLISyouWereMe]

@StephenKing I desperately need a movie about mermaids and sirens. Deep sea fisherman/ captains and crews being lured to their deaths. Mermaid lore. We are dying for this to happen. Pretty please?

[🇧🇷VitreousGlassy🏳️‍⚧️ (commissions open) @Vitreous_Glassy]

ideas for a whale in #minecraft!!!!

[Melissa @YouLISyouWereMe]

If you see me in the bathroom at work going into a stall, please do not speak to me. I get you want to chit chat, Stacey, but I’m here to do some damage. I don’t wanna hear your monologue about your new hot water heater

[Melissa @YouLISyouWereMe]

I wish aliens would infiltrate MY yard. And then mow it.

[Melissa @YouLISyouWereMe]

@Minecraft If you’re not Minecraft, affiliated with Minecraft, or a Minecraft nerd, keep scrolling. What is the best graphics card for a pc to get the best Minecraft experience?

[Melissa @YouLISyouWereMe]

@Mythicalsausage Hi there! GIANT fan! And I am currently enlisting the help of my brother to build my own computer! Was wondering what kind of graphics card you use? Or if you could recommend one? I play Minecraft on PS4 currently and want to make the switch! Let me know what you think! :)

[Melissa @YouLISyouWereMe]

@jonbellion and @PostMalone give me the same vibes just in different genres. For example: ‘The Internet’ by Jon Bellion and ‘Internet’ by Post Malone. Looks like you guys have some collabs to create

[Melissa @YouLISyouWereMe]

*Minecraft addiction intensifies*

[ellie schnitt @holy_schnitt]

woke up sick to my stomach because I dreamed about that fucking crackle nail polish we all wore in 2010 what the fuck was that who decided that shit was cute i’m in a cold sweat

[Melissa @YouLISyouWereMe]

@ahtnamas_yllek @ABHcosmetics I am INFURIATED for you 🥵

[Melissa @YouLISyouWereMe]

@Minecraft @MojangSupport @Minecraft Can you pleeeaasssseeee pretty please with cherries on top allow for/create shaders on PS4. I just want everything to be glowy and dreamy 😭

[ellie schnitt @holy_schnitt]

lighting a candle won’t technically solve all your problems but wouldn’t you rather cry in a room that smells like “sweater weather”

[Melissa @YouLISyouWereMe]

@holy_schnitt THEY DIDNT THOUGH. THEY DIDNT YELL. THEY TREATED HIM LIKE A SAINT. WHAT IS HAPPENING. HE SUCKS. ELLIE HELP

[Holland Beck @hollaa_backk]

if you’ve ever used a frat house bathroom you’re immune to the coronavirus

[Melissa @YouLISyouWereMe]

@Middle_suida Dear Evan Hansen

[Melissa @YouLISyouWereMe]

I would feed baby nut to baby Yoda

[BuzzFeed @BuzzFeed]

Who is cuter?

[shamus @shamus_clancy]

My lone Super Bowl tweet: no group of human beings will ever be as happy about anything as the city of Philadelphia was two years ago.