Your Fav Fratstar

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

Taylor thought it would be funny to piss in the display toilets at the hardware store. Hes being arrested right now.

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

@BucktownBadAss my sister wants to know why there are FB pictures of her friend taking a body shot off a bartender at Bogie's?

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

Its official, cops/security are looking for us now

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

We are both in our boxers in the lobby right now and david just threw up in the giant fountain

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

Wait since when do strippers demand respect? Tell her to get her friends and come back to the hotel room, now!

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

Dont freak out but someone installed a condom dispenser in our bathroom. I think its stolen so keep this on the DL

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

the whole time all i could picture was Kanye West barging in and saying "imma let you finish but I already hooked up with her"

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

Just had a exam, english paper due and my gf found out abt me and her best friend. I know how Kanye West's PR guy feels

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

So I'm hose sitting for my ex and me and david got drunk last night and shaved her cat to look like a lion. You have to come see

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

IDK where he is. He took some sort of horse tranquilizer so he probably didnt make it very far

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

Jason's car is in the impound, charlie says he knows how to open the gate and that the night officer is always asleep right now. You in?

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

Let me put it this way, if vh1 comes out with a 3rd season of tool academy, he would be a candidate.

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

Just found a handle of crown in the microwave and there is a strange bike in the kitchen. Yours?

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

All joking aside though, you need to return my neighbors cat. And wash off all the marker. Thanks

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

I seriously put my penis in time out for the week after last night. The chick ate like everything in my fridge!

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

I dont remember her name but i remember her face when she found out I was hooking up with her sister

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

$500 fine, contributing to the delinqency of minors, othr charges, and now I'm locked out of my apt and it's raining FML

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

That was the most fun I've ever had on the drunk bus.

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

@BucktownBadAss haha and remember those Thai prostitutes you thought were girls?

[Your Fav Fratstar @YourFavFratStar]

@audreynsuzanne Hey! Just living the dream. Whats up with yall!?