Thanatos

'Running will do you no good, I'm always coming'
Son of Nyx
God of Death
Hades' right hand man

(Parody, obviously)
They/Them ooc
(banner by Rain)

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

// I should really make a pinned, but that takes effort

And mine is all gone, so have this instead

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

// btw, this is real. Pray for my fingie

[☽.✦ 𝐇𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐞 ✦.☾ @DazzlingBlades]

Never leave a man unattended.

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

@SimpingBaguette // It's possible to parry rockets
Leon S "Too old for this shit" Kennedy has finally unlocked dad strength

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

@DazzlingBlades "Here I am, giving you my precious time"

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

@DazzlingBlades "Let's just say Jäger has caused a lot of paperwork for me in the past"

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

@SimpingBaguette // You grab his hair and he keeps walking until he's basically horizontal

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

@DazzlingBlades "You heard me. Who are we burying?"

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

@SimpingBaguette // France can't be a real country 😂

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

@DazzlingBlades *slowly sips wine*

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

@DazzlingBlades "That's why I never try to 'fix' you, just help you with self control"

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

// For the love of god, never move a metric ton of coal when your spine is already yelling at you

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

// I burned the ever loving shit out of my mouth, and got enough grease in my beard to summon the US Marines. It was worth it, especially for the sauce I made

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

// I am the Icarus of garlic bread pizza

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

I don't have kids of my own, but I do have the kids Hera got to first

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

// I am the Icarus of garlic bread pizza

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

// I'm drunk in the club and god damn this random woman I met is hot

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

"If you ever need to decide whether Greeks or Romans are better, just remember one thing. We have muscle mommies and twinks"

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

@SpringsWrath "Hot"

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

@SimpingBaguette // I saw "beer spa" and thought of a beer jacuzzi. I am now disappointed, and wondering if I should seek help

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

@SimpingBaguette // Curves = Squish
Serotonin is stored in the squish
Therefore, Squish = Serotonin

[Thanatos @YourLast_Friend]

@SimpingBaguette // Imagine a mod that gave him an actual shirt