Yunger

Fictional stories • Daily motivation • Unfiltered thoughts ✍️

So obsessed with progress.
Unbothered by opinions😎

[Yunger @Yunger01]

Husband: So, after 12 years of marriage, you really want a divorce?

Wife: Yes. I’ve made up my mind.

Husband: Fine. If we’re ending this, let’s be fair. What do you want from the marriage?

Wife: I want the house.

Husband: The house? We’re both on the mortgage.

Wife: I don’t care. I sacrificed more for this family.

Husband: Okay. What else?

Wife: The SUV.

Husband: Fine. You can have the SUV.

Wife: I want all the furniture too.

Husband: Take it.

Wife: And the jewelry you gave me…

Husband: Those were gifts. They’re yours.

[Your Ex 💔 @kingjace20]

Trying to remove poverty with bet.

[Peng🦋 @SusuDpeng]

Shyness and fear is an enemy of wealth.

[ms. @ms__faee]

Men that kiss and tell, what's exactly the length of your panties?

[ms. @ms__faee]

So, na men still dey rough handle these female celebrities for bed?

[Pwetty_Naza 🌸 @PeaceChinaza15]

Ronaldo has taught me one lesson that destiny can be delayed & still be denied😂😂💔

[Stikesh 7 @Stikesh3]

When last you ask your Boyfriend how he take Dey Survive,Abi e no concern you?

[Stikesh 7 @Stikesh3]

Incase you don forget; women sabi lie, Just enjoy your moment with dem.

[Sparkle Movies🍿 @CeePDa3e]

CHARLIZE THERON ⚔️🔥

Her commanding presence, fierce intensity, and convincing action skills would make every battle feel like a Hollywood blockbuster. 🎬🍿

[Yunger @Yunger01]

@DChronicleTales That’s the kind of quiet thing most people never find out about. He just made sure the ground would still be there.

[D Chronicles Tales @DChronicleTales]

Every morning at 5:00, before my eyes are fully open, I drop a paper filter into the basket and hit the brew button on my old Cuisinart.

Last Tuesday I pulled the basket out to dump the grounds, and there was a tiny number on the inside of the plastic rim. It was etched, not printed, with clean edges like it came from a machine. Eight digits.

I knew them. I'd read them off the water meter tag outside my back door when I filed a billing dispute last spring.

I walked outside in my socks and lifted the lid on the meter box. The tag matched, digit for digit...

[D Chronicles Tales @DChronicleTales]

Everybody knows the routine. I walk down the driveway, toss the junk, and flip through what's left on the way back up. Last month one envelope looked like a power bill, white with a plastic window. But where the return address should have been, someone had taped an index card.

It had two lines of numbers in blue ink, latitude and longitude to five decimal places. Under them was a date, March 14. I closed on the house in September.

I stood there a while. Then I walked the driveway again, slowly, looking at the windows across the street.

I'd been in the house five weeks. In that time I'd seen a flashlight moving around my backyard twice, well after midnight. Both times I'd flipped on the porch light and it had gone dark. I told myself it was a raccoon with a flashlight, which isn't a thing.

The envelope was empty except for a second card. *Please don't mow the northeast corner.*

I put the coordinates into my phone and walked out. They landed on a patch of grass under the maple, maybe ten feet from the fence. It looked like every other part of the lawn, except the grass there was a little greener and the ground felt packed hard.

I told myself I'd call the police if I found anything buried. Instead I called the number on the sign at the realtor's office and asked who had access to the house before I bought it. The agent said the owner had died and her kids lived in Oregon and Arizona. They'd hired a man to keep up the yard.

"Not a man," she said. "A neighbor. He did it for free."...

[D Chronicles Tales @DChronicleTales]

Every Sunday night my father plugged in a flip phone he kept in his sock drawer.

I was eleven when I asked why. He pressed it into my hand and closed my fingers around it, hard enough that I felt the hinge.

"Keep it charged, Mark. If it ever rings, you answer it."

After that I was the one who checked. It lived in a freezer bag under the winter socks, with the charger wrapped in electrical tape. In twenty-two years I never heard it ring, and he never made a call on it.

Gene Sims died in October. I took the phone to the carrier store to close the line, and the clerk turned the screen toward me. A fifteen-dollar charge had hit his card every month.

"The number was moved over from a landline in March of 2004," she said. "Same number all this time."

She read it out. It was the number from our old house on Alder Street, the one we sold that spring.

I thought it was money. I spent a week going through his bank records for a debt, a loan, someone he owed. I found his pension, a dentist, and the fifteen dollars.

I told the clerk to leave the line open. She shrugged and charged me for the month.

It rang on the eighth night. I was at his kitchen table with the bag in front of me, and I let it go three rings before I picked it up...

[Yunger @Yunger01]

@L_o_ng_man Yeah, the ego that comes with that usually messes things up.

[Manuel_ @L_o_ng_man]

Elon has paid some of you, and now you don’t want the rest of us who haven’t received anything to rest. 😂 You’re oppressing your ancestors, not me! 😭💔

[Manuel_ @L_o_ng_man]

Marrying highly educated working women will be one of the worst decision u will ever make in your life.

Big red flag. 🚩

[Manuel_ @L_o_ng_man]

No funerals in your home this year 🙏 bookmark this.

[Yunger @Yunger01]

@empress_md This is why I only use a virtual card for free trials now.

[HM @empress_md]

My kitchen sink wouldn't drain, so I called a plumber and asked, "What's the total?"

He texted me: "$95 flat, parts included."
He showed up within the hour and had it fixed in ten minutes.

When I opened my wallet, he said, "$310."
I held up my phone. "You texted me $95."
He shrugged. "That was just to come out. The fix is extra. You should've asked before I started."

I said, "I did ask. It's right here."
My neighbor walked up from the driveway next door...

[HM @empress_md]

It'll sort itself out," finance wrote back. That was their reply to my third email about the same deposit.

The money had landed on a Friday.

$2,340, labeled "travel reimbursement," for a trip I'd already been reimbursed for the week before.

I emailed finance that afternoon. "I think I've been paid twice. Can you check?"
Nothing. Ten days later, I asked again. "Following up on the duplicate payment."

That one got the answer.

I said, "Okay." Then I did two things. I didn't touch the money, and I started a folder.

I printed all three emails and the bank line, and clipped them together. I wrote "Not mine" across the top in pen, and put the folder in my desk drawer. Then I moved the $2,340 into a separate account I never opened.

Two months later, an auditor arrived for the year-end review. She sat in our break room with a laptop and asked each of us the same question. "Anything unusual you've noticed this year?"

When she got to me, I took out the folder and set it in front of her. I didn't say a word...

[HM @empress_md]

I ordered a "free trial" of a streaming service. The page said, "Cancel anytime."
I set a reminder for day six. I'm careful like that.

On day seven, I opened the app to cancel.
The cancel button wasn't there. Just a link: "Chat with us to manage your plan."

I started the chat. The agent said, "Before you go, can I offer you a discount?"
I said, "No, thank you. Cancel it."

He typed for a while, then wrote: "Your trial converted yesterday. $19.99 was charged."

I said, "I set a reminder for today."

He said, "The trial is 6 days, not 7."

I scrolled up and took a screenshot of the sign up page. It said...