(your) mom

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

I miss the nyt mini crossword

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

I just witnessed a construction site full of men stretch in unison

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

The stop and shop cashier didn’t ring me up for my strawberries. I can’t tell if this is good luck or bad luck

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

I was called unc last night. Worst part is they’re the same age as my boyfriend

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

I genuinely think I’m too emotional to run a marathon

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

I am looking at boxer brief marketing deliverables at 9:43 am for work. This feels wrong on so many levels

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

Ireland’s obsession with Obama will always excite me me

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

I despise the word concur

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

I don’t get how on gods green earth snakes are able to move like that

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

My dad is one funny mfer

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

I just saw an 8 yr old w a stick in his mouth like a dog. Please seek help

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

Nyt why you gotta do this to me today

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

Cardboard tampons 100% had to have been created by a man

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

His voice is 🤌. Addicted

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

Asap is so suave

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

Yo lowkey. Daylist eating lately

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

All the coolest actors are dying. Old time Hollywood is waning

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

I love Anne Michael

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

Trying to reread my meeting notes is like trying to break the Da Vanci Code

[(your) mom @Yur6996]

My coworker eats like Michael rappaport