SteveTheZeppelin

The Official Twitter Account For The Floating Home Of The United Press Federation.

[SteveTheZeppelin @ZeppelinSteve]

Why a self-sustaining Zeppelin that never lands and adopts children to be raised as journalists, we hear you ask.

Because there is no other way to guarantee true objectivity other than to literally be above the events we cover.

#TNSNewPandemia

[SteveTheZeppelin @ZeppelinSteve]

@leo4tweets All children adopted by the United Press Federation have been up for adoption for a prerequisite time span and given love, care, a lucrative career exploring the world, and the chance to better the human race.

[SteveTheZeppelin @ZeppelinSteve]

And now, a message from our sponsors:

[SteveTheZeppelin @ZeppelinSteve]

UNITED PRESS FEDERATION NEWS BRIEF FOR NOVEMBER 2020:

[SteveTheZeppelin @ZeppelinSteve]

BREAKING NEWS: As Of The End Of This Sentence, Without Explanation Or Justification, All News From The United Press Federation Henceforth Will Be Written In The Ancient Art of Haiku.

[SteveTheZeppelin @ZeppelinSteve]

Currently cruising at 2,500ft above the Archipelago Faction.

#TNSNewPandemia

[SteveTheZeppelin @ZeppelinSteve]

#FlashBackThursday: OMG, I used to be so fat back at the turn of the century. Reframing that positively, you could say I was THICC!

Hard work and switching from Hydrogen to Helium was not only slimming but also made me significantly less flammable! #YoureWelcome

#TNSNewPandemia