James Swann

Work in social media. Encyclopedic knowledge of comedy quotations. Husband/Chauffeur. Harlequins RFC. The Dude Abides. Fan of Partridge.

[James Swann @_ElSwann]

@British_Airways looking at sale offers and have seen a note claiming “children under 12 stay free from 24th October” - do you only see this discount appear on payment? Slightly confused by the offer as can’t see it on the itemised total.

[James Swann @_ElSwann]

@txadel_ At least he knows how @skytv feels though amirite @RishiSunak?

[James Swann @_ElSwann]

Wrestling fact I never knew 😮

[Wrestling Magazine @WrestleMagazine]

Look at that baby face Road Dogg

[James Swann @_ElSwann]

🥹 “under strengths you’ve just put accounts”

[Ricky Gervais @rickygervais]

Extremely sad news. The very funny and very lovely Ewen Macintosh, known to many as 'Big Keith' from The Office, has passed away. An absolute original. RIP.

[Tim Brannigan @tim_brannigan]

Purest Alan Partridge moment from Vine, here. Gold.

[Sky Sports News @SkySportsNews]

"I take huge inspiration from Roberto De Zerbi and his mighty Seagulls who did a demolition job on United yesterday" 😂

Joe Marler joked he took inspiration from Brighton for his bizarre headed assist in England's victory over Japan at the Rugby World Cup 🏉

[James Swann @_ElSwann]

@RuthCadbury is there anything that can be done about the sheer volume of roadworks and closures in and around Isleworth at the moment? It is gridlock at every turn and it is making any unavoidable journeys beyond miserable.

[James Swann @_ElSwann]

@NetflixUK And when will you be stickin on a bit of Barchester? Ecclesiastical politics when you’re high. These guys really knew how to do a fucking number on each other.

[Netflix UK & Ireland @NetflixUK]

It was decided this would have been so not Rainbow Rhythms, so Peep Show will remain on Netflix.

[Paddy Power @paddypower]

“Are you pretending to write?”

[Snapdragon UK @Snapdragon_UK]

🙌WIN!
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Sound good? You should enter #SnapdragonKickUps!

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✅ Post your best kickups video
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[Barstool Football @StoolSoccer]

Ivan Toney making his way down the tunnel after being sent off in the 22nd minute for catching the ball at the half way line.

[Ryan Butterworth @RJButterworth11]

The original version PARKLIFE 😆

[James Swann @_ElSwann]

If the light up jacket is anything to go by, he isn’t winning this fight (worse than a pair of kiddy trainers) #UsykJoshua2

[James Swann @_ElSwann]

@LatitudeFest can you confirm if Saturday day tickets are sold out please?

[Billie @Billie_T]

Eriksen scored at the bridge the last time we won there. Not saying that was a long time ago but he’s gone to inter, won the league, died, came back to life, joined Brentford and scored there again since it happened.

[James Swann @_ElSwann]

@shaunwkeaveny 🎵 Halston, Gucci, Ianucci 🎵

[James Swann @_ElSwann]

@MisterBoomer Or a highly reputable “global leader in marketing communications”

[Have I Got News For You @haveigotnews]

BREAKING: Cristiano Ronaldo’s return to Man Utd completely overshadowed as Leeds confirm they’re in talks with Tony Yeboah.

[James Swann @_ElSwann]

@maryannehobbs @BBC6Music @bored_lord Loved it