MANUH

Hata Mimi sijui

[MANUH @_ManuMreal]

Give this project a listen 🫶🏼❤️
https://t.co/310DMhCDaN

[MANUH @_ManuMreal]

😂😂😂

[MethoDman @polo_kimanii]

Kama kawaida vijana,Our time to eat good again has arrived. Tomorrow we will be attending the Nairobi city Marathon once again. Not to run,but to chase. Tulisema apa ndio tunapata financially stable women with disposable income to hold us through these tough kasongonomic times. Sasa wale vijana watafuata maagizo ya mhenga,mjue hii August inaweza wapata kule mpumalanga Johanesburg kwa kina Dj Uncle wafos mkiskiza Amapiano in a house balcony in the middle of a game park. Courtesy of a strong independent woman from upper kabete

Tulisema siri ni kutegea hawa wako nyuma,hawa ata hawakiambiangi,the obese,they are here to waste time jogging because they don’t have anything to do on sunday. Sasa wewe uko hapo kuwapa moyo,ukimtolea methali, “haba na haba hujaza kibaba mrembo,lets go” ukikaa kidogo unaongeza ingine, “baada ya dhiki faraja mrembo” . Remember to call her mrembo,even if shes 65 years old,they love that.

Inturn as you’re walking,shes going to point and ask you, “weh,do you know I am old enough to be your mother,ebu stop playing” If shes smiling while saying this,bas! Umegonga ndipo.

Now reply and say “miaka yangu ililiwa na nzige” . Shes not supposed to understand what that means so she’ll ask what? This is how you start a conversation. Mwambie ulichelewa kuzaliwa,lakini makosa niya wazazi. Hapa sasa she will acknowledge this guy has wisdom,I wonder what else hes going to say. And she will tolerate you,she lowers her guard

Na tulisema Wale wako huko mbele wachana nao,hao ni walalahoi. Wamelipiwa na kampuni,hao wacha wang’enganie kushinda pesa. Sisi mambo yetu iko huku nyuma.

And make sure you have also talked about manly things like How you know a friend who was working in a Ukranian Drone manufacturing company,and you buried him recenly in kisii after he was killed by Russian spys in Mozambique

Now In finishing of the running,itakua saa saba ivi,hand her your phone,ask her for her number,,mwambie wewe ni fitness coach. Ama basket ball coach,and you’ll be happy to help her burn a few callories since you dont have much to do. Akikupea namba kesho,Dont text her,text her on Tuesday,ndio asione kama uko desperate eh?. She’ll take some time to think,and then answer on Tuesday evening,

Na juu anajifanya ataki mambo mingi,she’ll tell you to come to be training her at home,on Saturdays. She has a big compound,Theres no way shes driving her Land Rover to your gym (that doesn’t exist) in uthiru to train. Ingia youtube hiyo usiku angalia mastyle.

After 3 sessions kule karen,you must intentionally erect,Amusha kitu! and she sees it,and then you’ll tell her “jesus! This never happens” pretend you’re ashamed. Tell her theres something about her,you just don’t know what. She’ll tell you its okay

Sasa baada ya hapa,niyeye huwa anakutega. She will start by overfeeding you. Baada ya hapa ni mauwano! Na hiyo shamba lazima ulime msuri ndugu yangu,sababu hiyo ndio inaamua sasa kama next week unakula kabeji bila nyanya ama coconut fish and salad.

Wuui! Sema kimeumana. Ukipita mtihani sasa kazi yako itakua kumuombea kikongwe wako asimaliswe na diabetes angalau uenjoy maisha london kidogo. Ukingojea ile kazi ya NGO alikuambia atakuconnect. Hapa naye utakua unamkumbusha kumeza dawa buana. Juu akikufa unajua kile kinangoja apa nje. Ainuliwe yeesu!

[BHENtel @TheBHentel]

My boy down but not out

[MANUH @_ManuMreal]

Pale hazina trade center inajiita lojah restaurant

[#𝐍𝐚𝐭𝐞 @RealNate08]

Ni restaurant gani mtu anaweza peleka dem out na kshs 3000 in Nairobi CBD? Saidieni wakubwa it's urgent

[FIFA World Cup @FIFAWorldCup]

5 days to go...

Cristiano Ronaldo is the first and only man to score at 5️⃣ editions of the #FIFAWorldCup 😤

[MANUH @_ManuMreal]

Berlin

[Jessica M @Jesii_ca_M]

Which country you want to visit?

[Hanch Tarchup Jr. @misharipov]

I just don't understand why women think they need all these surgeries

[Fabrizio Romano @FabrizioRomano]

💭❌ Kylian Mbappé: “I did never rewatch the 2022 World Cup final. Never”.

“If I watch it, it might awaken some demons. We have to move on. We lost”, told Sorare.

[🐾 @elsdawg]

how exactly was this conducted???

[Wes Blumarine @mvsty_mvhd]

That's Uther Pendragon to me

[Kay @legendaarykay]

I’m curious, what’s the current best show of the year if not Widow’s Bay ?????

[SANTAN @Santandave1]

My 28th Birthday

[Blicky @blickytoosticky]

top 5 niggas ever

1. michael jackson
2. franklin saint
3. ghost
4. lebron james
5. nba youngboy

[MANUH @_ManuMreal]

Eric Omondi wants to be the center of everything,he'll do anything for attention and such people ain't good leaders .My opinion though

[Edwin🇰🇪 @justWailer]

Mkuje msupport hustle yangu..yut fi yut💪

[Ray Mond @AmberRayz]

Me listening to how bad things have gotten at my job since I left

[MANUH @_ManuMreal]

Polo clears

[Aura salad🥗 @usagebeast]

lil durk has no solo hit song. prove me wrong.

[Moe @moneyacademyKE]

KBC has secured free-to-air broadcast rights for the 2026 FIFA World Cup.

[PROFESSOR @SIGMAPROFESSOR]

Bro nuked the entire women’s community with just one tweet.

[Moriö @tebogstaT]

When she thinks she’s competing with other girls but she’s actually competing with how happy I am alone.