Gentlemen, if there is any advice you will take from me, let it be this one:
To hell with "indoda ayikhali". If you feel like crying. Do it at your earliest convenience. Weep! That sh*t is nice. You feel so much better after doing it. Ungazincishi.
Fuck beating around the bush. If sex is all you want, make that shit clear. If you want a relationship, make that shit clear. If you want someone to talk while your significant other is acting up, make that shit clear. Don't use people !