Sarah Schuler

breaking & becoming

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

@LGUS @LGUSSupport stole $450 from my family’s small business. Merry Christmas!

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

mother in law complained about the fruits & vegetables that I packed my son for the weekend because “he needs real food” (she returned from the grocery store with a frozen pizza)

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

is there a phrase equivalent to “city girls up” for women happily married with children bc my husband finally agreed to let me redo his wardrobe & I need an expression to match the occasion

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

why is “how are you?” the go to for small talk bc that is actually not a casual question at all to ask me on any given day

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

I’m not a complicated woman my will to live costs $6 & gets poured into a 24 oz plastic cup every morning

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

can’t stop thinking about dog breeds what do you mean beagles & pugs are the same animal

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

got to incorporate “that’s bananas” into the vocabulary .. quickly !

[micaela amor @Its_MicaelaAmor]

i miss ted lasso

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

does H‑E‑B have merch

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

hot girls mix neutrals

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

post psychosis grounding meal

[erin chack @ErinChack]

when you all talk about having rizz, this is what i picture

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

@picklefigphoto it’s very good dyl

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

emptying the drafts & becoming a book girlie see you guys later

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

explained to my now husband that I used to listen to Jimi Hendrix on the way to every first date for hype just in case I got heartbroken or I had to break their heart instead to which he responded “are there not other ways a first date can go?” (I had not considered that)

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

why does buying beer still make me nervous I’m 24

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

the dj at my wedding really questioned my inclusion of ari’s thank u, next on the playlist but what he didn’t know was that it was my maid of honors favorite song despite having married her first boyfriend and does not, in fact, have any exes

[Sarah Schuler @_Sarahhemilyy]

I don’t even care if it’s some psychological shrink manipulation my therapist tells me everything I want to hear & I love her for that Linda if you’re reading this