Alex Watson

[@dfarecs @lethalrejection]

i hate “delivered quietly” i want my message to scare you like the sound of a bird flying into a window

[Bailey Sarian @BaileySarian]

I think wine tastes like shit and everybody just pretending.

That is all.

[˗ˏˋ ryn ˎˊ˗ @onlineryn]

2023 is the year of being sneaky. the year of plotting. scheming. this year is for the tricksters. for the swindlers. now is the time for the duplicitous scoundrels to run amok

[a @aallleeexxxxxx1]

when a man is annoying me, i hate that. but when i am annoying to a man, i think that’s something to get excited about

[maximus〽️ @Maxthepapi]

It bothers me so much that there are so many songs I don't know about that I might like so much.

[Alex Watson @_WatsonAlex]

Wordle 214 2/6

⬛⬛🟩⬛⬛
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

It’s gonna be a good day.

[Kierra | Data Conversationalist🎙 @iamKierraD]

I do not enjoy the beauty maintenance process(nails, lashes, brows, wax, hair, etc) at all. I wish I could just drop my body off and pick it up when the service is done.

[Alex Watson @_WatsonAlex]

Buying presents last minute not because I’m unorganised but because I can’t keep them secret that long

[Alex Watson @_WatsonAlex]

My boyfriend will buy me flowers and then proceeds to shade me that they start to die. Like I am not a god, I can’t prevent this from happening bruh

[Alex Watson @_WatsonAlex]

What an entirely dreadful couple of days I am having 🙃🙃😁

[Alex Watson @_WatsonAlex]

@MikeWoodstar Also a great response. Could even go as far as a chuckle brothers -
“oh dear oh dear”

[Alex Watson @_WatsonAlex]

Sometimes you see a pregnancy announcement and all you can think is “oh no”

[Alex Watson @_WatsonAlex]

I’m sad to wake up tomorrow and Halloween will be over ☹️

[Alex Watson @_WatsonAlex]

I just don’t think spiders should be able to swim you know

[Alex Watson @_WatsonAlex]

Nothing screams the landlord doesn’t give a fuck, like having carpet in the bathroom

[Chloe Hutton @chloehuttonv]

How do insta girls manage to pose in those ways in front of their pals without feeling awkward, any time someone takes a photo of me I’m genuinely stood like this

[Alex Watson @_WatsonAlex]

Death to all wasps. Death.

[Alex Watson @_WatsonAlex]

Man ate my shortbread and won’t even look me in the eye

[Robert Lindsay @RobertLindsay]

If this was your son
you would fill the sea with ships of any flag.
But don't worry.

He is not your son.
You can sleep peacefully.
And above all of course,
He is not your son.

He is just a lost son of humanity,
Dirty mankind, that makes no noise.

He's not your son
Marco Leoni