For any women that need to hear this, there are loving men out there. There are men who will sit and listen to you while you talk about something that bothered you. There are men out there that will take accountability and apologize. Who can be aware of their behavior and how it affected you. Men that you can grow with. Men that will make you feel appreciated. You don't have to go through years of trauma with a man who doesn't know how to communicate and has no emotional intelligence. You are worthy of healthy love. And it is out there I promise you.
You need to see the joy on olodos' faces when a very academically sound person doesn't succeed in life. They relish it. It's almost as if it gives them more reasons to talk down on education and intelligence.
When we were graduating, after I finished as the top student in my class, many of my coursemates were really eager to see how I would turn out. In fact, I would always hear them gossiping: "No be by Best Graduating Student. To make am for life no be by acada. Street na military. We go see."
I'm glad I turned out really well. Even most of those who went to Ghana for "updates" after school and eventually resorted to fraud can't measure up to my accomplishments. Till today, many of them still randomly call me and jokingly ask, "Senior man, you just dey chop dey go. You no wan give men update na!"
Deep down, they genuinely believe I must be secretly involved in fraud. This is the society we live in, where many young people have come to believe that you can't succeed legitimately, and that every young man who is doing well for himself must be involved in fraud. Even many elderly people and police officers aren't exempt from this line of thinking.
I haven't seen a country that is trying so hard to make education unattractive like ours.
"School na scam."
"No be by BSc. You get BTC?"
"Education is the key to success. Oya, use the key start Benz na 😂."
"Lecturer pack 1999 Camry, student don pack Lexus beside am."
If we continue this way, in a few years, there will be nothing left of our educational system. We are so money-centred that we don't even realize education can be an end in itself and not necessarily just a means to an end.
Everything has become, "How much do you have in your account?" or "Use your intelligence buy Benz na."
This is one of the reasons it really hurts me to see highly intelligent and brilliant people end up poor. I'm always rooting for academically sound people to succeed because I genuinely want people, especially young people, to see that you can make it legitimately through hard work and academic excellence.
Any society where only the olodos become financially successful while the brighter minds, the ones who believe in due process, continue to struggle is a society that is bound to fail.
Do you ever get exhausted by food? Not the food itself, just the endless cycle of deciding what to eat, shopping for it, cooking it, and having to do it all over again every single freaking day.
A big part of actualizing as a woman is coming to terms with your physical characteristics and your natural style and not wishing you could look like someone else.
Life is so incredibly unpredictable. You might have a terrible year from January to June only to have your life dramatically change by July and end up having the best year of your life. I need that.