Alec Jones

26 - Taurus - (he/him)

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

i think I want a chiropractor to snap my neck so hard that i die

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

i'm the "sorry, i was asleep friend."

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

just ate a hot pocket cause i felt like shit and have now been rejuvenated

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

i just choked on my last bite of spicy ramen and coughed so hard i threw it up. i am in agony.

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

i've gone to the grocery store today, had breakfast and now i will melt into the couch and watch a black lady sketch show while getting ripped

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

i love that my dad always has weed

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

that whole being nauseous because you haven't eaten but not wanting to eat because you're nauseous is no joke

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

you mean when all the plates are in the dishwasher and you're just like "well, this will work."

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

i fell asleep after i turned on the heater because i was chilly and now i'm so hot i could cry

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

i am trying so hard to finish this vitamin c drink that i ordered because it was $8 but it tastes like when your grandma dies

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

the sailor scouts

[Film Updates @FilmUpdates]

Jessica Chastain becomes the fifth actress from The Help (2011) to win an #Oscar  since the film was released.

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

omg i forgot about the box of velveeta shells and cheese i have. i am blessed on this day.

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

i haven't gotten my mail in 5 days, not on purpose but i just forgot and let me tell you...the amount of burger king coupons i have received is concerning

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP SHOWING UP TO MY HOUSE UNANNOUNCED!!!! ITS 730 AM!

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

https://t.co/a4Qub2TuIt

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

sometimes i scroll back through the tiktoks i send my friends and just be like, "i'm fucking hilarious."

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

gonna take an extra prozac now that the oscars are over and dance around my kitchen manically

[billy eichner @billyeichner]

I’m getting under my couch.

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

i take a delicious sunday nap and will smith slaps the shit out of chris rock. you can't make this shit up, yellowstone should just erupt already.

[tyler oakley @tyleroakley]

wait what’s going on with will smith

[Alec Jones @_alecjones]

@AmyKinLA @NineDaves i am only capable of so much