Ally Masters

had the worlds 10th fastest time racing Luigi Circuit on Wii Mario Kart for 10 minutes in 2009.

[Ally Masters @_allymasters]

@stfusznnh I laughed for 20 seconds straight.

[🪳🕷️ The Korpse 🕷️🪳 @kornbreadTMFS]

I’m only staying at this hotel. Ion give a damn if it’s a motel 6

[used to be Michael's chip 🇵🇸 @aswaggerprince]

that's Ray Liotta

[Ally Masters @_allymasters]

@Tory__Story @JediManda @BobMackie Happy birthday, angel ❤️❤️

[Ally Masters @_allymasters]

Louisville, Kentucky has got me feeling like I have a long lost lover 24/7.

[Ally Masters @_allymasters]

Well…

[Ally Masters @_allymasters]

Someone tried to blackmail me for $500 over my missing cat today. Pls send sedatives and copious amounts of bourbon.

[Ally Masters @_allymasters]

@moonchildisback Of course it is. Why? Because it is also MY favorite.

[Ally Masters @_allymasters]

@aswaggerprince What a beautiful egg !!!

[Ally Masters @_allymasters]

My favorite pastime about visiting New York was telling my friends that Big Daddy was filmed at whatever location we were at the time.

[Ally Masters @_allymasters]

@aswaggerprince Sluts 4 Candi we are

[Ally Masters @_allymasters]

For every big holiday, I make Caci her favorite meal. She thinks it’s out of love. It’s really to ensure that she will never be able to eat it again without thinking of my superior version if we break up.
Xoxo

[Ally Masters @_allymasters]

@moonchildisback You’re a dream of a human.

[Ally Masters @_allymasters]

@ohh_lauralove @Purple As someone whose laid in your bed, yes. Best sleep of my life.