Amy

Smooth seas never made a skillful mermaid.

[Beth Moore @BethMooreLPM]

I’m going to try to be a nicer person. So please don’t annoy me.

[NBC Entertainment @nbc]

*mom voice* "If GPS told you to drive into a lake, would you do it?"

[Beth Moore @BethMooreLPM]

Want to say one last thing before I’m off Twitter for the workday. Don’t let mean people make you mean. Hold onto kindness for dear life.

[Michael Gary Scott, Dunder Mifflin (Parody) @Da_MichaelScott]

Maybe next time you will estimate me.

[Amy @_amyvwilliams_]

@brianfvarner @bobbybonesshow Same

[Beth Moore @BethMooreLPM]

Fellow travelers, will all the cell phone wall chargers we’ve left in our hotel rooms be waiting for us in heaven?

[Amy @_amyvwilliams_]

Nobody:

Luke P.: “I laugh in the face of danger”

@BacheloretteABC #TheBachelorette

[Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings]

gooooob morning. the human made me a pancake. in the shape of a heart. it tasted similar to a circle pancake. but meant a lot more

[John Crist @johnbcrist]

I clicked on an insta story and then walked away from my phone for a bit and it automatically watched everyone’s story YOURE WELCOME ALL 377 PEOPLE I FOLLOW I HOPE YOU ALL FEEL LOVED AND SUPPORTED

[Michael Gary Scott, Dunder Mifflin (Parody) @Da_MichaelScott]

He had no arms or legs. He couldn't hear, see, or speak. This is how he led a nation.

[Bobby Bones @mrBobbyBones]

anyone know where I can get tickets to next years Fyre Fest???

[Amy @_amyvwilliams_]

@hv_myrick The greatest thing I’ve ever seen

[Heather Varner @hv_myrick]

@amycvarner

[Michael Gary Scott, Dunder Mifflin (Parody) @Da_MichaelScott]

I knew exactly what to do. But in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do.

[Nick Peterson @iamNickPeterson]

Do unto others as Chick Fil A would do unto you.

[Heather Varner @hv_myrick]

“Angels don’t have cleavage.” #grandstweet

[The Office on Peacock @theofficetv]

When you're tired of the cold weather.

[Chelsea Peretti @chelseaperetti]

WHY DOES EVERY ONLINE RECIPE BEGIN WITH A 40 PAGE ESSAY ABOUT SOMEONES HUSBAND DOG AND KIDS AND A BRISK WALK THEY TOOK IN THE FALL AND HOW THEY LOVE THE CHANGING OF THE LEAVES AND THEIR DOGS FAVORITE TREAT. GIMME THE RECIPE HON MY SCROLL FINGER HURTS

[Amy @_amyvwilliams_]

Least favorite day of football season