PSA: ANYONE WHO USES ESSENTIAL OILS PLEASE READ THIS!!!
recently my dog and cat have been acting strange, very lazy, sick and just not theirselves. i took them to the vet and turns out it’s from tea tree oil. i use this oil in my diffuser and it’s TOXIC to dogs and cats
My boyfriend: *leaves the room*
The fbi agent in my webcam: No I totally see what you mean.
Me: right? He's weird today. How's your husband?
FBI agent: he wants us to open our marriage
Me: that's rough janet.
any time you hear an immigrant speaking broken english and you feel like laughing, just remember that you took spanish for 4 years and you still struggle to speak a coherent sentence
Ladies have u seen the Sephora X-pro Anastasia color pop eye glow ki- ok now that the men have officially lost interest in this tweet, this is ur sign, we attack at dawn.
*creation of the kangaroo*
God: Okay so the deer was a big hit let’s work off that
Angel 1: What if it could carry it’s offspring with it for protection
God: Okay that’s kind of weak Sharon but we’ll add it
Angel 2: What if it could kick the shit out of you
God: There it is