Chinu

Lost love of my life, my dear wife to Cancer in Jan 2009. World is a maze since then. Use this account as a memoir and diary.

[Chinu @_chinu]

Would have been 20 years today. Miss you Pragati.

[Chinu @_chinu]

Life is so freaking hard really!! Looks like everything is out of control. What have I done to deserve this? Or maybe I have done a few things to deserve this?

[Chinu @_chinu]

So tired! So alone! ☹️

[Chinu @_chinu]

I am walking bent sideways like you since a couple of days. Really a grim reminder of how much pain you endured for months. Mine is just a muscle spasm though and I will get better unlike you ☹️

[Chinu @_chinu]

Happy 15th wedding anniversary sweetheart. Hope you were here ☹️

[Chinu @_chinu]

@benbrooksdutton God. Has been a long time, like forever when I last read something so true for myself. Good to know you and so many others go through the similar feelings. 11 years since my wife passed away. It really never gets over I guess 😢

[Ben Brooks-Dutton @benbrooksdutton]

Let someone know you’re thinking about them 🖤

[Chinu @_chinu]

Sorry Pragati, I couldn’t be your Shiva, but you definitely were my Sati. Miss you. #ShivaTrilogy by @authoramish

[Chinu @_chinu]

Happy 40th Dear 🙁

[Chinu @_chinu]

It took a long time and lots of challenge to become what I am now. But I finally 4 the first time in my life feel complete, whole. Someone whom someone like you deserved & could be proud of. I am just so sad that you aren’t around to see me and our daughter right now. Miss you ❤️

[Chinu @_chinu]

I was so dependent on you that I literally fell apart when you went away. I am sad that you can’t see me now. You would have been proud. I am sorry that I couldn’t be a better husband to you. Someone who could take care of himself and also his daughter like I am doing now.

[Chinu @_chinu]

I gave her your watch now. You should have looked at her, how proud and happy she is to wear that old watch of yours. Breaks my heart and I just want to cry knowing that, you will never, never be able to look at her doing all those things. Our wonderful daughter.

[Chinu @_chinu]

She is starting to look more and more like you. Her hairs, eyes ❤️

[Chinu @_chinu]

She is 10 and finally she knows about you, her real mother. I feel so much lighter after telling all this.

[Chinu @_chinu]

New life now. Just me and Chibu now.

[Chinu @_chinu]

Just when you start dreaming again? Life kicks you. How dare you hoped for happiness?? Will I be really happy again?

[Chinu @_chinu]

What the hell I am really doing? It all looks really complicated at the moment.

[Chinu @_chinu]

Remembering today, how you used to stir coffee powder in cup & promise me a great coffee. You tried, you really tried. u were the sweetest.

[Chinu @_chinu]

Ya I am still broken 🙁

[Chinu @_chinu]

Even met someone really interesting and for a brief moment really thought, maybe I have another shot at happiness. But maybe not :-(