Crystal Czerniak

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

Hobbies include: grabbing more than half the stack of paper towels on any public bathroom counter to dry my barely damp cleansed hands

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

The number of times I think “you dumb bitch” in my head while doing normal daily activities is getting out of control

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

ok, MOM 🙈🙄

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

Also realized that “Oh yeah no for sure totally” is a full sentence I’ve uttered and the English language sucks

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

So apparently there’s no way to look cool/put together while eating cup of noodles in the work cafeteria

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

Ppl who wait at other cross section stop signs until you get there. ..I get it safety first, but also yes I see you and could have already gone by now, you cautious freak

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

Rain: provides necessary nourishment for the earth to sustain life but also somehow simultaneously washes away the knowledge of how to drive

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

Other hobbies include online shopping and going back to the site every hour to review my purchases and confirm my good decisions 👠👙👜🕶👗

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

Shoutout to ex-boyfriends for giving me so many T-shirts to donate #HurricaneHarvey

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

#HurricaneHarvey 😱

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

The Safety Check feature on Facebook is a great opportunity to add ppl I previously didn't know lived in my city to my "who to avoid" list📍🌪

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

My hobbies include looking up the menu of where I'm going to eat dinner later

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

mood

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

I think I adjust the air temp in my car at least 3 times more than any drive should realistically entail #hotnowcoldnowhotagain

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

Saturday morning and youths are youthing on the IM field approx one loud scream's distance from my bed

[Chili's Grill & Bar @Chilis]

@jennafischer we hope you felt God tonight.

[Jenna Fischer @jennafischer]

OMG! Second drink!!! https://t.co/xGGM78iaX6

[Jenna Fischer @jennafischer]

Should I try to go in?

[Crystal Czerniak @_classyCrystal]

I think Netflix keeps track of which movies I watch most frequently and then removes them the following month