✩₊˚.☾⋆𝓰𝓪𝓲𝓵⋆.₊˚⊹♡

🍓🐮💕🌸✨ • ☉ ʙɪᴛᴄʜ (♎︎) | ☾ sʟᴜᴛ (♉︎) | ↑ ᴄᴜɴᴛ (♊︎) • 𝖘 𝖙 𝖋 𝖚 • ₊˚⊹♡ •

[✩₊˚.☾⋆𝓰𝓪𝓲𝓵⋆.₊˚⊹♡ @_cowgail]

being a bitch is my kink

[soup🌱 @thrluv]

youre telling me a banana nut in this bread??????

[Toxie Havok @ToxieHavok]

The "H" in Jesus H. Christ stands for Hoobastank because he died for a reason and the reason is you

[✩₊˚.☾⋆𝓰𝓪𝓲𝓵⋆.₊˚⊹♡ @_cowgail]

I’m so glad that my life doesn’t feel like it’s falling apart with every minor (or major) inconvenience I have. That sounds exhausting!!

[✩₊˚.☾⋆𝓰𝓪𝓲𝓵⋆.₊˚⊹♡ @_cowgail]

Why do men think it’s ok to talk loudly on the phone in public.

[✩₊˚.☾⋆𝓰𝓪𝓲𝓵⋆.₊˚⊹♡ @_cowgail]

@mylifeasthomas_ 🫩

[⚙ DUCK ⚙ 🎸⭕️ @Robotomii_]

FIRST PERSON TO DRILL HOLES IN HIM GOES TO HEAVEN

[✩₊˚.☾⋆𝓰𝓪𝓲𝓵⋆.₊˚⊹♡ @_cowgail]

The worst seasons are upon us 🫩

[Nini Dol @NiniDol_]

Not a single person who has disrespected me has a life I admire. And I think that says it all.

[Euan| BLM @Euan_A_C]

I am genuinely shocked at how many people just casually use ChatGPT instead of just like… thinking

[𝗠𝘂𝗵𝗲𝗲 ♛ @muheediva01]

What’s the corporate way of saying, “I’m not fucking doing that”

[grace @gracefishlove]

Sorry about the mean things i said when i was right

[miia @miiagarro]

you mad at what i said or you mad bc it's true

[✩₊˚.☾⋆𝓰𝓪𝓲𝓵⋆.₊˚⊹♡ @_cowgail]

I’m so happy for Knicks fans. I love when a team who hasn’t gone far in YEARS finally wins their big playoff game!! 😭😭 (Not you, Cowboy fans)

[Degen CPA @DrewVento]

Not one member of Metallica ever appeared on sesame street. Master of puppets my ass.

[sammm ☆ @onlysammms]

tbh i can never sympathise with men. how are you still a loser in a system that has literally favoured you over everyone and everything since the dawn of time ????

[PeePee🎀 @peegzy1]

No one has a victim complex like a man who thinks he’s a good person.

[bimbo baggins @allyson_meghan]

saying “happy pride” to random straight men to make them paranoid all month

[✩₊˚.☾⋆𝓰𝓪𝓲𝓵⋆.₊˚⊹♡ @_cowgail]

@culkinqueen

[sammm ☆ @onlysammms]

and for the lady, perhaps a long-term loving relationship that makes her feel safe enough to be vulnerable and doesn't turn into a lesson