kelly.kestis

Dicks, balls and gently queer inuendos. they/them.

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

Overheard in Barnes and Noble:
"I didn't know Ed Sheeran released a new song!"
"This is Tracy Chapman."

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

Love the @nflnetwork switching from the giants game to the supposedly preempted patriots in the middle of a fucking play

[Chandler 🎃 @_chandler_____]

31 fan bases who complained about Taylor Swift being at the games just saw their team’s cap space increase by 30M.

You’re welcome.

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

Spoiler: he didn’t eat Grover. There’s still another couple books so 🤞

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

I’m reading the Percy Jackson series for the first time (via audiobook during my commute) & I’m on book 4: The Battle of the Labyrinth. I’m only on chapter 3 but it has reaffirmed that I would die for Tyson.

Now that I’ve typed it, I think he wants to eat Grover & I’m scared

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

I have to say, since I started my “nostalgia” reading, I have been enjoying reading more? It doesn’t feel like a chore. Yeah, the series I’m reading now (PJO) is for a younger audience, but I *like* it. I’m having a good time. Im not racing to the finish like I normally would.

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

@lindabreeezy Eragon is DEFINITELY on the list, especially since the new book came out.

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

My book goal for the year is to complete “nostalgia books/series”. I’m rereading books series I read or should have read or never finished as a youth. I’m not buying any *new* books UNLESS they’re a series continuation or written by an author on a shortlist.

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

I’m in my 4th book of the year and considering some of these books were directed to youth originally, I think I can clear 100

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

I’ve got too much on my TBR and on my bookshelf that haven’t been opened or finished in years.

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

It’s fuckin cold, my dudes. You’re the asshole getting a car wash while it’s cold enough to immediately freeze. Also - TIP MEEEEEE

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

It was 12* this morning, according my my weather app, the “real feel was -8*”. The hot water that we use to wet down the cars was literally re-freezing on the cars. I had so many complaints about how slow I was moving and how I wasn’t getting all the ice off cars.

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

@EGRLFRlEND Saaaaaaame. My dad has watched the same movie four times because he can’t remember ever seeing it. I was there all four times.

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

@EGRLFRlEND My dad watches Oak Island so I got him a metal detector???? 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

Also, this is just my voice. You are not entitled to anything beyond professional politeness. I don’t need to talk to you the same way I talk to a customer. I need to be professional and polite. That’s. Fucking. It.

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

I’m so sick of every man who has worked for me, telling me I’m too aggressive” when I speak to them. I’m “aggressive” because I’ve told you the way things need to be done, in a nice tone, about 7 more times than I should. Now I’m frustrated.

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

@FilomenaMUA I also want this!!

[clare @sadderlizards]

sorry my hands are so cold all the time it’s because i died a few years back

[Cat Elgarrista @cat_elg]

i do believe that bears are dangerous and anyone who thinks they can get close to one is very stupid. but i also think i am different and the bear would sense my loving spirit

[kelly.kestis @_greensick]

I would lay down in front of a train for Mina Kimes and she has betrayed me in this way???????????

[Mina Kimes @minakimes]

My potentially controversial pie take is the actual best pie is one that’s not even served on Thanksgiving: Key lime. I’m sorry but it’s true!