My children are not on the autism spectrum because I took Tylenol while pregnant. They’re on the autism spectrum because I, a person who will wear only one type of shoe and can’t eat food that is “too potato-y,” had babies with a man who has an encyclopedic knowledge of European aristocracy but a limited ability to process social cues.
you are currently locked in a kohl’s dressing room with 5 ill-fitting bikinis. as time goes on, the fluorescent lights will grow brighter, the AC will stop working, & the sound of katy perry’s “roar” will get louder. to escape, try on all 5 swimsuits without crying. good luck.