NinjaBertle

sour patch vegan with a cat. retired student athlete. they/them. opinions are my own and not reflective of my employer.

[NinjaBertle @_itsjustBert]

@needycv @The_SoWavyBrand Ppl showing every day that boomer isn’t an age, it’s an ideology

[iLumpE @iLumpee]

it’s fucked up that a single serving of 12 beers is about 2400 calories

[Cinema Tweets @CinemaTweets1]

Finding Nemo (2003; Stanton)

[𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐢✰ @_timiszn]

How do I explain to people that I can just slip into my nonverbal mood and it has nothing to do with anyone.

[miia @miiagarro]

the world contains protons, neutrons, electrons and fucking morons

[PeePee🎀 @peegzy1]

No one has a victim complex like a man who thinks he’s a good person.

[karl mark @bluntghoul]

causing a civil war in my groupchat by saying i would fuck hunter biden

[NFL Drop @TheNFLDrop]

BREAKING: Jets have agreed to a 3-year, $150M deal with former Rams DE Aaron Donald, coming out of retirement.

Aaron Donald did not agree.

[NinjaBertle @_itsjustBert]

Omfg im officially back on morning shift in less than 10 hours fawk

[Libriscent @libriscent]

i think it’s very important to have a little cat to come home to at night

[NinjaBertle @_itsjustBert]

It turns out Texas fans are fine with the transfer portal if it’s being used to leave Austin

[NinjaBertle @_itsjustBert]

I said I have tofu scramble and potato hash for breakfast and my coworker said that sounds like a miserable existence like damn I didn’t know we felt so strongly about vegetables😭

[Corey Clayton @CoreyClayton]

Gotta love when a @Newsweek hack rushes to get a “Caitlin Clark trade to Sparks rumor” piece out for engagement farming, and forgets to delete their AI chat prompts from the piece.

#NowYouKnow @IndianaFever #WNBA

[Deeqa♡ @not_active06]

My fav tinder encounter to date

[YUH 🫟 @__jahlil__]

My fav jersey shore lore is that Gym, Tan, Laundry was their code term for picking up Cocaine.

[Diabetic of Enlightenment @dee_of_e]

slob on my knob
sponge on my bob
I’m Mr Krabs
come do your job

[Jack J @Jack_Frodo]

tag @HunterBiden instead of grok for your questions from now on.

[The Ginger Swindler @lilydsmith]

coworker asked me if ive been “seeing those hunter biden tweets” baby i can recite them. i pledge allegiance to them.

[David @dqveed]

notice how the bear realized she wasn't interested and left her alone without calling her an ugly bitch

[NinjaBertle @_itsjustBert]

It’s so clear none of the ppl in the replies watched her put Stanford on her back for two years. Nobody would shame a young person for leaving a job they hate after trying to make it a better place for two years. College sports fans are so weird.

[Texas Tech Softball @TexasTechSB]

Thank you, #24 ❤️

You’ve forever changed the game. The impact you’ve made will be felt for generations.