maturing is realizing that, as an adult, you have to decide “this is the last time these people are going to make me feel this way,” and stand by it. whether it’s family, a relationship, or a friendship.
what you do in private, shows in public.
Reading shows in a conversation. your diet shows in energy. your discipline shows in confidence. your focus shows in your results. you are what you cultivate when no one is watching. prioritize your time & focus on discipline/consistency.
my college professor once paused mid-lecture, looked at the class, and said, “love shouldn’t make you fall behind in life. u can be in love and still keep building yourself. if being with someone feels like dragging your dreams behind you, it’s not love, it’s an anchor. don’t apologize for leaving it behind.” that one sentence made me rethink everything
your SPOUSE is the one who’ll sit beside you when your PARENTS DIE. who’ll hold your hand through CHILDBIRTH. who might have to BATHE YOU if you’re ever too sick to stand. this isn’t just about BUTTERFLIES or DATE NIGHTS. it’s about choosing someone who SHOWS UP... in GRIEF, in MESS, in UNCERTAINTY. so no, LOVE ALONE isn’t enough. COMMITMENT, MATURITY, and the ability to ENDURE life’s ugly parts... that’s what sustains a MARRIAGE. because when life gets PAINFULLY REAL, ROMANCE won’t carry you... CHARACTER will. and the truth is, FOREVER is only possible with someone who knows how to STAY when it’s HARD TO LOVE
someone told me yesterday that when they feel nervous about trying something new & their heart starts beating really fast, that they call it their “inner applause” because their body is cheering them on, and i think that’s the best narrative adjustment ever.