Laura

Bionic woman with all-natural swag

[Laura @_laura305]

I am unstoppable

[Elisabeth @leburneraccnt]

We used to be a country. A proper country.

[Laura @_laura305]

Hobbies: trolling men

[Laura @_laura305]

The urge to compare every salsa I try to Chili’s salsa

[Laura @_laura305]

Pepperoni is a good meat to snack on. I would never deny a piece. It’s in the fridge waiting for me and honestly it’s comforting

[Laura @_laura305]

Self care is eating eggs for dinner and listening to the A Star Is Born soundtrack

[Laura @_laura305]

Whenever I drink kombucha I truly believe I am the epitome of health

[Laura @_laura305]

Me: immediately falls in love with famous men who play guitar

[Frog and Toad Bot @FrogandToadbot]

'I will do it tomorrow,' said Toad. 'Today I will take life easy.'

[Laura @_laura305]

Message men on bumble with absurd questions to test them. Such as: are u team Edward 🧛🏻 or team Jacob ? 🐻🐅

[donni saphire @donni]

Are you anxious or just fully aware of the many threats that exist

[Laura @_laura305]

The Microsoft Teams app and Taco Bell app look almost exactly the same which is very confusing for a woman like me who has notifications turned on for both

[𖥔 ࣪˖ 𝓓𝓪𝔂𝓼𝓲 ⏾*:･ @wildflowerdaysi]

90’s public washroom — designed by stéphane plassier ⭐️🌙✨

[Laura @_laura305]

I want this man and I want him now

[Laura @_laura305]

@candarod No I’m too insecure of my riding

[Laura @_laura305]

My mom this morning so serious - “are you going to wear your heelys to the airport?”

[Laura @_laura305]

Honestly grateful for the cold conditions. The ice makes for a perfect challenge that strengthens my riding

[Laura @_laura305]

Me: “I stare at a laptop screen all day it’s so bad for me”
Also me after work: stares at my iPad for 2 hours to digitally paint an egg

[Laura @_laura305]

Tired of seeing hot men on tik tok that I can’t have. That’s it