I feel like people are far too quick to dismiss things about bands they like just because the situation isn't as black and white as pedo allegations. It makes you look ignorant if your first reaction is "everyone is complaining about nothing"
The problem was never just the drunk sound engineer and the fact that that’s still the only part of this story that gets acknowledged because it’s the easiest to reframe fault for you guys is exactly why people are still talking about it. You guys keep framing this like it was some unfortunate situation with one employee that you “handled the best you could”. Bffr. The sound engineer was ONE situation. It was not the only situation. The issue was how the people who reported the behavior were treated, being brushed off when concerns were raised, and blame being shifted onto the people being affected by it. Threats, intimidation, being told to stay quiet, being portrayed as liars afterward and watching the story change every few months depending on who you were talking to. The issue was also the creative exploitation that people spoke up about. You had a trans creative continually be deadnamed and misgendered after being corrected several times. People know the shit you guys have said and done behind closed doors. There were legal threats, ongoing intimidation, and people being warned to stop speaking about their experiences or “it would be very bad for them”. The issue was watching people try to speak up and then being met with hostility, damage control and attempts to discredit them instead of ACTUAL accountability. And let’s stop pretending nobody knew what was fucking happening. You knew people were uncomfortable, you knew people were reporting issues. Hell I did from day 2. You knew people were being berated (including by your own band members!). You knew people were crying and talking about leaving. You knew people were saying they felt unsafe.
The whole “we didn’t know” or “we were just trying our best” angle is fucking ridiculous. At a certain point if multiple people are coming to you saying they’re being mistreated and your response is to minimize it, question it, defend the person doing it, ask people to stay quiet, or threaten the people speaking up, that’s not protecting the people being harmed. That’s protecting the problem and that fucking bothers me. Because now it’s being framed like nobody could have possibly known better. These things are not hard to fucking recognize when they’re happening right in front of you and you guys choose to address it when it’s convenient (aka now that fans are asking you guys to be removed from the tour). It’s clearly a performative PR move.
You wanna talk about safety? Let’s talk about it. Let’s talk about the fact that people who came forward were treated like the problem instead of behavior being corrected and addressed. The original purpose of speaking out was never to destroy anyone’s career. It was to warn other women and LGBTQ+ creatives/crew to approach with caution based on our experiences because it’s clear you guys don’t know how to safely foster an environment for them. These parasocial fucking fans can say whatever they want but they truly have no idea what actually happens outside of the way you guys portray yourselves. There were actual consequences to all of this. I was pushed to the point of nearly taking my own life, some of us nearly ended our careers because of the way we were treated and the way it was handled afterward and STILL continues to be handled. This isn’t some internet drama that got blown out of proportion, we were genuinely harmed by it. It severely pisses me off that it’s gotten reduced to “there was a difficult guy and we learned from it” when it’s still ongoing and he’s out of the picture. The damage wasn’t caused by him. It was caused by the people who watched it happen, dismissed it, protected reputations and then suddenly acted fucking shocked when people eventually started talking about it. The people who lived through it remember it JUST fine. You’re not victims.
Last year I toured with a band named Dark Divine. After much consideration I want to speak up about my experience.
While on tour I was subjected to consistent verbal abuse and harassment from our FOH crew member, who drunkenly berated me every single day. It began significantly impacting my mental health and ability to do my job. Despite multiple attempts making them aware and the situation escalating to the point that I felt physically unsafe — the response from the band was dismissive and not handled with proper emphasis. Instead of support, I faced a lot of blame for my reactivity to how I was treated and gaslit by being told I was too emotional. I was made out to be the unreasonable one when I vocalized what was going on. I was picked apart and made to feel it was my fault for not enduring this abusive behavior and making it easier on everyone. I was also asked to be quiet and not publicly speak about this by mgmt before I decided to leave tour early. I stayed silent for almost a year out of concern for my career, but I have had my name defamed behind my back and false rumors spread about what actually happened, as have others.
I've recently been made aware that my experience isn't unique, and I am not the only crew member to deal with this level of unprofessionalism & abuse from them; some worse. I will not be sharing the other peoples' stories as that is their decision to come forward if they feel comfortable in doing so.
I am not sharing this in attempt to cancel them, nor do I care who believes me. I have more than enough support behind me and have moved on. I just want to put emphasis on awareness and any women / LGBTQ+ people considering working with this band to just be mindful of their behavior. I am really tired of the lack of accountability & I do not want anyone else to be subjected to hostile work environments that we have - and if this helps at least one person that's all that matters.
We are thrilled to announce the formation of a brand new deathcore ba-
We are sorry to announce that a brand new deathcore band has broken up after resurfaced allegations against the vocalist, drummer, bassist, both guitarists and tour manager.
Learn more at link in bio.