mel🫧

IG: melanny_mariee | SierraSnipes911 | 🇨🇺🇩🇴

[Simon Sarris @simonsarris]

When you go to the playground you find some parents that literally follow their child around, narrating everything, constantly redirecting the child to play with different things, boxing out exploration and play with other children

[mariana Z @mariana057]

Physician: Your body has ran out of magnesium.

Me: 0mg

[T⛷️ a.k.a Phillip @PhilosopherTB]

Guy at my resort was saying I shouldn’t have pork on my plate but is here with a white woman, brother who is really eating pork

[Staladus 🐁 @Staladus]

The atheism leaving my body the moment the Pope starts talking about how AI is an affront to God and the new Tower of Babel

[WeRateDogs @dog_rates]

We really wanted to introduce you to Vanilla. She has the daintiest handshake we've ever witnessed. 14/10

[Persimmon OT @OtPersimmon]

My face throughout the ride so the driver knows I’m not easy to kidnap.

[MatrixMysteries @MatrixMysteries]

“We have to have sympathy. We need to at least let them engage in some stock trading so they can continue to take care of their family.”

Americans are tired of watching corruption dressed up as virtue.

[Asa @xAsamoahx]

I hate being around people who mistake my childlike wonder as naivety or weakness. I am simply a war general who loves to giggle.

[Alina @AveAveces]

Ni los guionistas de wall-e la vieron esta

[clariforniagirl @claryxz__]

a pior parte de ser uma mulher engraçada é ter que escolher entre manter a dignidade ou fazer a piada perfeita

[maya @mayaviatwitta]

i never beg except when it’s to differ

[t @bytotta_]

I like people who find a way
There is always a way

[leilani dowding 🌸🚜 ☮️ @LeilaniDowding]

When they say it’s for safety, remember the guy whose van wouldn’t move out the way of a truck because he don’t have his indicator on. His lane assist came on and he couldn’t get it to move back into his lane

[Melat Kiros for Congress, CO-1 @MelatKirosCO]

One vote by a member who's not seeking reelection this cycle, so his district can't hold him accountable, and establishment Democrats can still pretend they tried to end this war. What a disgrace.

[miia @miiagarro]

just cut off a student driver. welcome to the real world hoe

[𝐒𝐌𝐎𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐖𝐈𝐙𝐀𝐑𝐃 @swizardcore]

how it feels pretending to agree with people so they stop talking

[Mads @europemaxxed]

when you've calculated the amount of sleep you're gonna get but you can't fall asleep so it's getting lower

[WTF @mrwtffacts]

In 2019, 53-year-old Fred Pepperman was on a Florida beach when a riptide swept his three daughters out to sea. Grace (16), Olivia (20) & Kathryn (24)

Hearing their screams of “Dad, help us!” he dove into the raging water with zero hesitation. One by one, he saved all three of his daughters by pulling them back to shore.

Moments later, exhausted from his heroic actions, Fred collapsed to the ground & died. His final words to his daughters were “I got you”

[a broken soul @abrokensouI]

how it feels to say “girl whatever” instead of arguing

[Cłoùd𖤐 @vapefuls]

he runs to the water. a noble instinct; motivated by compassion for the strange creature he has just discovered in his hand