lukewillhill

Full of half-baked ideas, but I try. Just me, myself & I. I tweet about literal shit.

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

I just sneezed once for the first time in 10 years.

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

Definitely walked into cinema a week early.

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

@emsutherington Heavy nah.

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

You're a pleb if you drink Monster before 10:01am

[Gary Lineker @GaryLineker]

Seems Kanté is going to join Conte, which is pretty cunty.

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

@virginmedia the lack of customer focus and options given to me have made moving home that little more of an annoyance.

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

@virginmedia I can't afford to do so and the woman on the other line didn't to give me another choice but take it up with a third party.

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

@virginmedia I want to move address but where I'm moving to, Virgin doesn't have access to. I now have to pay my outstanding balance in full

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

@virginmedia have really got a knack for winding me up with stand off customer service with bad soft skills and stinking attitude.

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

Kurt Russell is my spirit animal.

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

Sidenote - cook more chicken when drunk.

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

Need to stop drinking and making a fool out of myself.

[BoJack Horseman @BoJackHorseman]

more like master of yum #getit? but seriously @AzizAnsari would your dad consider adopting a well adjusted horseman?

[berbatov cocktail @ComradeYouSpurs]

Dele Alli just made Paul Pogba look like Paul Pogblart, mall cop.

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

Thanks to Leicester train station for fucking up which train I get on. I'll be waiting an extra couple of hours.

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

I want a combination of a burrito, pizza and burger in one.

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

@oobacceb where are you now that I need you?

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

@oobacceb right where you left me.

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

@oobacceb yes, yes you can.

[lukewillhill @_monoculars]

@PROBOTitans hope it all goes well #everylittlehelps