silly goofy whore

daddy's money guilt

[ATF Recovery Diver 🤿 @an_appeal_toGod]

My fianceé when I identify a WWII aircraft by sound alone

[• @yducknow]

When you realize everything is so expensive and still God hasn’t let you you go hungry, homeless or empty

[clara!!! 🐝 @eumudeidenome]

"buzzing about this" how Oscar felt after saying this

[𝓟𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓬𝓮𝓼𝓪 🐸 @princesalamwane]

Let’s normalize installing cameras at home just to watch our cats live their little lives

[sipsi @garibansipsi]

bugün gördüğüm en komik tweet

[teoni @teoniw]

Getting my pussy ate tomorrow

[faget83629031852 @faget9261530128]

My parrot just said my full legal name and flew out my window

[𝕛𝕒𝕟𝕖𝕒 @heyyitsjanea]

because it’s fucking cute Cecilia

[ryan @cowboysunse6]

Taking a guy on a date tmrw and he just told me it’s his first one ever

[ỌBA DÉLÉKÈ  👑 @ObaDeleke]

My project:

[𝓮. @ahseilars]

Fiz minha psicóloga rir a sessão inteira e no final ela me deu um encaminhamento pro psiquiatra, não entendi…

[𝔏𝔦𝔬𝔫𝔢𝔰𝔰 @InsaneMistress]

this is great news if hockey players could read

[Lyss @blvefvr]

My gf just got out the shower smooth as FUCK and climbed into my bed with one of my t shirts on and I feel like a DOG

[Lorenzo Davids @UrbanLo]

This is what humans do. We are humans.

[José María Luna @JoseMLuna]

I once got so mad at my mom I used a broomstick and a blanket to pack like this and I distinctly remember deciding one of the few belongings I had to take with me was the Shrek 2 DVD

[hunain @hun8in]

never getting old