Let me tell you...
The first 7 years of your marriage is about the most hectic as a woman because that is the period you make babies...2 or 3 as you want. If you combine child bearing, raising them and work without structure, you will burn out. So what you need is structure...and once you have passed that phase where you don't have a toddler anymore...it becomes less physically tedious but more mentally 😊.
Try not to overdo anything, the house doesn't have to be sparkling clean, you don't have to wash every single day, structure cooking to one day, get a visiting cleaner and one who irons. Use the school bus service. Once they leave, if you're home go back to sleep. Choose weekends to take them to a relative so you can have time for internal and external body massage with Oga. Tell him to take them out on some weekends so you get a rejuvenating sleep.
Always set things the way you can have time to do the things you love ..read, watch movies, listen to music, write if you love to, go for walks...don't neglect you.
You are doing well. Strength to you.
Chiamaka, Aproko doctor’s wife, for the first time, came across a dish and made a video on the preparation. She referenced its name and origin. Some tribalists have been shouting on the post, attempting to bully her.
It’s a pity seeing what some of you are doing with your youth
My wedding cake! The story behind this cake is for another day! Uhmm let me just say as a baker don’t ever try to fix your own wedding cake😩!
I know it’s a dream of yours but just outsource it.. it was too much for me.. I’m glad it turned out well..I was too exhausted!
A woman that loves you would start addressing herself by your surname even before you marry her. And she would be looking forward to making it official.
That is all I'll tell you.
I watched Cute Abiola’s documentary all 1hr+ and I have thoughts☺️
Before I say anything else whether he made it for content, for money, for clout, or for all three combined that is between him and his Creator. I am not his judge and neither are you.
But I want to talk about what I actually saw. Because a lot of people are so busy being offended that they completely missed the lesson.
I am not just a random person with an opinion on this, I was once married, once pregnant and I delivered a child not by CS though but I know what it feels like to be in that vulnerable space🥹
Your body is doing something extraordinary and terrifying at the same time, and everything you need in that moment is just someone to hold you steady
Some of us didn’t get that
I was 8 months plus pregnant when my ex husband told me he would throw me out of the house. His exact words to me "mio fe wahala kankan, tio ba wo mo ma le e jade toyun toyun ni." Just like that
No "let me hear your side of the story" No pause to remember that his pregnant wife was standing right in front of him. His sister-in-law said I was giving her attitude and that was enough for him to deliver a verdict. I didn't even have an altercation with this woman she just reported me and he believed it. At 8 months pregnant
I got war while I was carrying a life inside me, I got unhappiness, I got days and nights of tears during a time I should have been protected.
So when I watched that video and saw how that man moved around his wife the reassurance, the way he prayed over her, the sheer presence of him I felt something shift in my chest
Before they even left for the hospital, his mother prayed with them at home. They walked into that hospital already covered and in that theatre, he was right there with her praying, holding space, not scrolling his phone in a waiting room somewhere pretending he wasn't scared.
You cannot manufacture that. 2 people who are not genuinely rooted in faith together cannot perform that level of synchrony when everything is on the line. His wife was going in for her third surgery in four years. Three surgeries. Her body has been through it. And she was still open, still willing, still at peace. A woman who feels used or exploited carries it in her face. Watch it again. That woman was not performing.
She consented to every frame and her spirit showed it.
Even after sharing about the ectopic pregnancy people are arguing about 3rd surgery in 4 years and about content,privacy and monetisation
But can we also talk about the fact that there are men who have never once considered that their pregnant wife is not just carrying a baby she is carrying fear, physical pain, hormones, uncertainty, and the desperate hope that the person beside her is actually with her? There are women who watched that video and felt grief because they realized they never had that and didn't even know they were allowed to want it.
And the women who went through what I went through threatened, dismissed, unseen, during the most vulnerable season of their lives we watched that documentary differently. We weren't watching a content creator. We were watching a standard. A reminder of what should be normal but isn't.
If this were a western documentary now you people would be crying in the comments and awwiing here and there 😂😂 but because it is one of ours, some people called it stupid content
We really need to do better.
Take the lesson or leave it. But the lesson is there.
Pray for a kind partner. Not just a fine one. Not just a successful one. A kind one. One who will stand in the theatre shaking and still choose to pray instead of panic.
May Allah continue to bless their home and keep it from every evil eye. Ameen.
And to every woman who carried a pregnancy in pain, in silence, without the softness you deserved I see you. You were not too much. You were just in the wrong hands.
— Eniola Olaniyan
Basic hair intelligence for girls:
1. Braided wig is trash. It makes you look tacky
2. 5*5 frontal is better than full frontal.
3. Tfrontal is tacky.
4. You don’t need 26+ inches of bone straight if you do not own a car.
5. Pixie curls are a must-have.
6. 12-inch bob wig would stress the hell out of you.
7. 10” BS is a must-have.
8. You don’t need coloured hair if you don’t have enough black wigs.
9. 70k deep wave is a waste of money.
10. Basic wigs: 10”BS, 14”pixie curls, 16” fringe STW, 18”bouncy hair, quality Tiwa hair (not 35k), all black or neutral colour
Bonus: No matter how beautiful that blend hair is, DON'T buy it. I know they'll tell you it lasts better than human hair. It's economical, and all you need to do is maintenance. I repeat, DO NOT buy it❗❗❗
Someone said this: “once your kids no longer depend on you for food and survival you are left with the relationship that you cultivated or lack thereof.” I think it makes a lot of sense