Dearest mother —
The battleground has called for my glorious return. I’m thrilled to say, I shall heed that call.
I have reenlisted.
While my sidearm is permanently holstered — I shall help train other young men to be great soldiers. Please send care packages of squirrel oil and skunk cakes to our basecamp at Stanford. I love you.
— Andrew
@MarkMaristch add consistently missing fourth down attempts! preventing our extremely competent kicker from scoring!
blocked punt certainly falls under the disastrous and borderline comical category lol