Sim

[alxndr @alexaldente]

This man is going on two decades of consistently proving he is an absolute piece of shit and it’s so embarrassing that anyone still listens and supports him

[introvert @livewithnoregrt]

Loyalty behind your back is top tier

[grace @gracefishlove]

ur hating on me and im kinda seeing where ur coming from

[Softboy @softboywin]

I think smartphones are ruining our lives but also if I had to go to the airport in 1998 with just my wits & a subway map I’d kill myself

[Prasenjit @Star_Knight12]

master's degree used to guarantee a job, now it doesn't even guarantee an interview https://t.co/06CsttGfDh

[Soleil @soleiljolina]

Having unwashed hair will have you believing shit like I can’t be saved

[rhyme @Rhymestyle]

we weren't soft about everything back then

[Bummer T. Vibes, Esq @VibesBummer]

When I’m eating shared nachos I’m always thinking 3 nacho moves ahead of my opponent.

[゛ ☆ .ᐟ ⋆ @veinIuvr]

and for the lady, perhaps a fucking break

[Nora❦ @hiscoraline]

girls, we need to frantically and obsessively start reading books and finish them in less than 24 hours again.... remember how happy we were back then??

[️s @big_sam_atari]

"Forgive me, Father, for I have dripped."

[Lyn🦋 @_ayandamay]

Yesterday I saw a bird with a worm at 4pm. Don’t ever let anyone tell you you have to get up early...

[dior ✞ @deeore5]

imagine leaving a sneaky link in 1867 and you go outside and your horse is dead

[nu @erasednigga]

i be at work ugly as fuck😭😭😩

[dior ✞ @deeore5]

gas prices too high right now to miss an exit

move bro i'm backing up

[𐌁𐌉Ᏽ 𐌕𐌉𐌌𐌉 @OrevaZSN]

The fake urgency in corporate jobs kills me. We're not doctors, we work in spreadsheets. You don't need to circle back for a response an hour later.

[໊ @wynavira]

the reason men can open jars easier is because they don’t moisturize

[Mamello🧚🏽‍♀️ @MelloFelicia1]

it hurts my feelings when i accidentally scare a bird away. why can’t it sense my whimsy

[Lewis Capaldi @LewisCapaldi]

Me deciding what to wear on stage every night

[ྀི @hrtindica]

ppl who wake up and immediately start talking are crazy