Alexa ☀️

mutant & proud • @epicbrologan is pretty okay sometimes

[Alexa ☀️ @a1exalynn]

Emmy racing to the chicken nugget aisle

[Alexa ☀️ @a1exalynn]

@Marinagyun96 @swiftiemoth FOR REAL. Home girl was ready to end it all

[Alexa ☀️ @a1exalynn]

@blackmirror 2025?!?! 🥲

[Alexa ☀️ @a1exalynn]

@fessyfitness I thought the hashtag was you saying it’s not your baby if it’s not a boy not you clarifying it wasn’t your baby at all 😂😂

[michaela okland @MichaelaOkla]

Real music always wins

[Alexa ☀️ @a1exalynn]

Class act 👏👏

[Jon Cooper 🇺🇸 @joncoopertweets]

BOOM: Lauren Boebert denied vaping in the show.
Too bad for her it was all caught on video!

And then her boyfriend's hands went... 🤮

[Jeff Tiedrich @itsJeffTiedrich]

listen up, stupids:
John McCain lost his election and fucked off back to Congress.
Mitt Romney lost his election and fucked off back to Congress.
Hillary Clinton lost her election and fucked off and went home.
Al Gore challenged the results in ONE STATE, and when he lost, he fucked off and went home.
Donald Trump lost his election and freaked the fuck out and sent a mob of armed morons to the Capitol to disrupt the certification, and he also headed up a ginormous criminal conspiracy to commit election fraud in Georgia, all so he could cling to power — because he's a big fucking baby who can't deal with being the huge fucking loser that he is. and that's why your guy is in deep fucking shit right now

[Gabriel Bosslet @gbosslet]

“Welcome to the first day of school everyone. Let’s do introductions.”

My name is Dan

“Ooh it says here ‘Daniel’”

I go by Dan

“OK I’ll have to call your parents and let them know”

[1984’s George Whorewell @EwdatsGROSS]

When I have to decide what’s for dinner

[Trixie Mattel™ @trixiemattel]

can we stop letting the oldest living people we can find run the United States

[Qasim Rashid, Esq. @QasimRashid]

Worker: I can't live on $7.25/hr

GOP: So go to college

W: I can't afford $100K tuition

GOP: Take out loans

W: I can't afford to pay these at 8% interest

GOP: No one forced you to go to college

W: But you just said—

Billionaire: I NEED MORE MONEY!

GOP: Here's a $2T Tax Cut

[tyler oakley @tyleroakley]

NOT A DRAG QUEEN, A PASTOR

[victoria ♀️ @fatfabfeminist]

if 6 people, who were not elected into their position, have the ability to strip an entire country of their rights maybe that country does not actually have the right to call itself a democracy

[Jeff Tiedrich @itsJeffTiedrich]

listen up, stupids:
Donald Trump told you the FBI planted documents. you believed that lie.
then he told you that he did take the documents, but he declassified them with his mind. you believed that lie.
then he told you that he returned everything. you believed that lie.
then he told you that he didn't have to return anything, because they belonged to him. you believed that lie.
then he told you that he would have returned them, but he was too busy to. you believed that lie.
now he's telling you that the tape of him bragging about having classified war plans is fake news, and you're going to believe that lie, too.
I have one question:
when the fuck are you finally going to get tired of being lied to

[Alexa ☀️ @a1exalynn]

Colleen ballinger…oof…

[matt bernstein @mattxiv]

i just think that if i had even a fraction of the wealth either of them had i would not spend my days drooling over a keyboard about how the most marginalized people in the world are oppressing me actually