sal a. mander

i got a glock in my ‘rari

[sal a. mander @aayelloh]

the last time i felt something was when i got double bounced on a trampoline

[The Lesbian Pervert @babyknifespice]

I believe I was put on this earth to make women laugh and also cum

[໊ @user0000O0]

pick me choose me euthanize me

[ripley ⚢.𖥔 ݁ ˖🛸── .✦ @spacephobos]

call that pussy bruv the way im innit

[hani @crucifynisis]

freak4freak yearn4yearn

[vivi @mooncatvivi]

kinda fucked that being alive means you have to think and i have the Gets Really Suicidal When Thinking disorder

[sal a. mander @aayelloh]

@abbieangie THERE ARE TOO MANY NAMES WE COULD DROP

[sal a. mander @aayelloh]

do u ever see someone so clapped that they surely can’t be a real person

[sal a. mander @aayelloh]

actually screaming giggling kicking my feet every time my girlfriend sends me a selfie

[Chris @citehchris]

you should be allowed to leave work early if you miss your wife enough

[໊ @wynavira]

i always am about to go to sleep at a beautiful 11pm and then something happens to me

[hera @shiningdaisies]

unfortunately i could never be nonchalant because i am not well in the head and also my soul is on fire

[sal a. mander @aayelloh]

anyone who uses safari should be on a sex offenders list

[𝖎🐚 @cha0ticlesbean]

Strap is not heteronormative because there’s no man involved and we both cum. Hope this helps x

[soup🍓 @thrluv]

sometimes i let my coochie make my decisions call that clitical thinking

[ari @intotheariverse]

how to softlaunch being a clingy needy fuck

[sal a. mander @aayelloh]

right time, right person, right everything

[sal a. mander @aayelloh]

it fucken wimdy

[marty ✮ @intrctvintrvrt]

genuine question for english speakers: is there a way to say that its really fucking windy, violently windy like an idiom or a fixed phrase of some kind? something for when you go outside and want to complain

[g @34rths]

Post irritation clarity just hit And I am probably the worst person on earth

[pingu @pingu4ll]

i wish i had a hamster's ability to die under severe stress

[Soleil @soleiljolina]

Born to be an abstract concept, forced to be a perceivable being