Shitty Academic Writing Tips

Writer's block? We're here with tips guaranteed to put the 'action' into your 'retraction'! Mostly geoscience!

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: many academics like to organise their week into 'meetings days' and 'research days'. A popular ratio is 5:2
#AcademicTwitter

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: everything is machine learning now #EGU22

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: uploading a prerecorded talk for the conference? You have as much right to run over your time limit as anyone else #EGU22

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: Start your conference talk with a joke. Or two. Actually make it all jokes, it's day 4, we need this. #EGU22

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: convention says that if you hook up with someone at #EGU22 you should add them to the acknowledgements of your next publication. It's only polite.

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: volunteer to review papers for journals. Get revenge.

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: a professor's wild speculations at a conference can later be cited with 'Personal Communication (2022)' to back up your arguments. Try to guide them. #EGU22

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: is nobody asking questions after your talk? You were probably too specialist for them. Or too interdisciplinary. #EGU22

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: promote cybersecurity by making your attendees use a VPN to access the schedule #EGU22

[Sujania Talavera-Soza @sujaniaas]

First day at #EGU22 and the schedule of the sessions is not available while the session is happening :/ but at least there is free coffee! @jagtschotel

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: if you were planning to ridicule someone's work and they're in the audience, bring them up to the front #EGU22

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Overheard at #EGU22: "Like everyone in academia i've overpromised and underdelivered with my slides today"

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: struggling to write a short talk? Write a long one and only give the first half. #EGU22

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: dust off your old Twitter account for self promotion during conference season.
See you at #EGU22!

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: dust off your old Twitter account for self promotion during conference season.
See you at #EGU22!

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: on Zoom nobody knows if you smell

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: refer to Twitter fights you get into as 'The Discourse'
#AcademicChatter

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: calling your plans 'ambitious' means you get to backtrack later #AcademicChatter

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: is your code documentation intuitive and easy to follow? If so this does not meet community standards and you may need to obfuscate. #AcademicChatter

[Shitty Academic Writing Tips @academic_tips]

Tip: don't be afraid to ask people to like and subscribe #AcademicWriting