.

they/them x

[James @FunkDoc1112]

Me watching Peter Parker make all his problems worse by isolating himself from everybody

[. @acannotbearsed]

“use our new app ONLY” *new app doesn’t work*
“ok use the old app whilst we fix the new app” *old app doesn’t work now*

@ScotRail can’t view my season ticket in the old app, can’t view it in the new one ?

[caitie delaney @caitiedelaney]

should I try Hinge again or perhaps just start penning a manifesto

[Jack Robertson @Jack_Robertsonn]

I’m just a sucker for pain

[dev 2 @devy_nation]

she asked if ive seen the odyssey and I told her I odyssey them titties

[Rev. Dr. Boudyka @bdk1521]

WE FUCKING TOLD YOU THIS WOULD HAPPEN, YOU FUCKING MISOGYNIST DIPSHITS -feminists

[Rita Repulsive @myc0latt]

If i ever get back into dating and discover that someone i thought I'd really clicked with was using an ai assistant to manage our relationship the whole time i would kill myself in a way that redefines how the world thinks of suicide

[Gaby McKay @GabyMcKay]

ScotRail: “we’re doing a new app”

Us: “ah, cool so we can download it now?”

ScotRail: “no.”

“Take it you’ll be launching on a weekend then?”

ScotRail: “nooooo”

“ok, well you’ve definitely made sure you’ve got server capacity for this?”

ScotRail: “you’re gonna love this…”

[Adam 🇵🇸 @sad_pali]

Fuck thats terrifying

[Benjamin Fogel @BenjaminFogel]

Seppt Blatter seems like a more wholesome era of corruption, like having a neighbourhood bookie or numbers guy compared to online casinos and sportsbetting websites

[JT @jiratickets]

can somebody get these BEGGARS out of here

[ZAYNA🇵🇸 FREE PALESTINE @HorrorHijabi]

The odyssey was so loud I thought I was gonna die on that damn ship

[dhwani @dhwanisaraiya_]

The Odyssey was the loudest movie maybe ever I thought I was going to die on the ship with them

[Jake Logan @JakeLogan0130]

“I once Instigated a full scale pitch invasion by the visiting fans at Ibrox after winding them up by dancing and waving at them”.

[Luke @LK__1998]

Well day one and you’ve turned the weather machine off, this isn’t a great start pal