Jessica

27. she/her. NC. heavy music loving weirdo. @megadethstan

[Jessica @acctuallyjess]

Mfers got one opportunity to act squirrelly before I burn the bridge. No that's probably not healthy, no I've never regretted it either

[Jessica @acctuallyjess]

I was the only person called out tonight and I was called out by two different bands, feeling like a local celebrity 🤣

[Jessica @acctuallyjess]

Went on a first date so good I almost said I love you

[Jessica @acctuallyjess]

I'm the coworker everyone calls to kill/relocate bugs and change tube bulbs and I actually love that

[kar @bustitopen420]

If only men could figure out this one simple trick

[Jessica @acctuallyjess]

Maybe this applies across the board, but men are notorious for being like "let me know when you're in town again" and the town is like 30 minutes away (right down the road by rural south standards). Blocked. Grow up

[Ebolaman @ebolaman131]

woke is back

[Jessica @acctuallyjess]

When men come into our primarily female office and leave the toilet seat up, I feel like they should be burned at the stake for that

[Jessica @acctuallyjess]

@averpee That's actually perfect. I do barely feel like a person

[Jessica @acctuallyjess]

Not having any romantic interest lowkey feels like I'm just waiting around to die

[Jessica @acctuallyjess]

As my 22 y/o coworker would say, I ate and left no crumbs

[Polling USA @USA_Polling]

Dark Woke is here and suburban wine moms are it's vanguard

[Tom Goodwin @tomfgoodwin]

I do find this just amazing

[jynx @jynxbby]

life beating my ass rn & mfs talking about “you’re so pretty” bro plz get tf on

[Jessica @acctuallyjess]

@SUPERxNOVA17 This girl's mom just told me a couple months ago that she couldn't find a job so mom had been covering her bills for a while 😭 homegirl literally is the targeted demographic & still acts like recipients just aren't working hard enough. It's wild

[Jessica @acctuallyjess]

This girl I graduated with is going off on fb about being so happy food stamps are being reduced, when I know for a fact her mom pays her bills 😭😭😭

The comments are all "I work 3 jobs just to feed my kids. Just like it should be" we are never getting out of the trenches bro

[Jessica @acctuallyjess]

@SUPERxNOVA17 Me too. Trump said he loves the uneducated 🤷‍♀️ they act like cutting social programs means less tax. You still pay the same tax, now you and your neighbors are just more likely to go hungry