Alex Pease

professional boogey boarder in training

[Alex Pease @acpease]

if my dog could talk I think he would have a lisp and I think about this more often than I’d care to admit

[Alex Pease @acpease]

back on my facebook marketplace bullshit

[Alex Pease @acpease]

@jontaffer we missed you at sidelines last night WHERE ARE YOU GOIN NEXT

[Alex Pease @acpease]

unhinged voicemails are my love language

[Alex Pease @acpease]

trader joe’s is just homegoods for groceries

[Alex Pease @acpease]

we’ve lived in this house for 4 months and I’m already categorically banned from using the garbage disposal

[Alex Pease @acpease]

is mouth tape actually a beauty trend or is this just a conspiracy launched by my husband to finally get me to shut up

[Alex Pease @acpease]

i always join book clubs but i never read the book and that is my cross to bear in life

[Alex Pease @acpease]

@MassSave oh no need to apologize bestie my insulation appointment’s in two weeks 🫶🏼

[Alex Pease @acpease]

this is the face of a dog who is begging @MassSave for insulation

[Alex Pease @acpease]

@mattyounis @MassSave Yes we’re ok just a little frost bitten

[Alex Pease @acpease]

my favorite hobby is being a menace

[Alex Pease @acpease]

living with someone with covid is WAY worse than actually having covid. like u see how things are gonna go but youre just a sitting duck

[Alex Pease @acpease]

and because I am a grade-A asshole I still said thank you & tipped 20%

[Alex Pease @acpease]

tried to close my tab at a bar last night and the bartender literally tossed my card in the trash????? and then 4 minutes later ASKED ME FOR A CARD TO CLOSE OUT MY TAB

[Alex Pease @acpease]

i only know she threw it out because they then proceeded to dig through the trash for 15 minutes and pull it out??? and then HAND IT TO ME saying I should probably sanitize it

[Alex Pease @acpease]

beans are really having a moment huh

[Alex Pease @acpease]

GET ME TO FRIDAY

[Alex Pease @acpease]

@kaydaustin When my dad was diagnosed w/ stage 4 brain cancer his company found out and within weeks replaced his role and fired him.

My mom’s company @hphood heard about it & hired him on the spot, giving him a job title + PURPOSE when he needed it most 🤍

[Alex Pease @acpease]

accidentally had an english muffin for breakfast this morning and have been feeling guilty about it all day 🇺🇸

[Alex Pease @acpease]

happy one year anniversary @ContactsDirect hope you step in a puddle wearing socks