Adam

🥃Caroni jabroni🥃

[Adam @adambombpgh]

[Elton John, after not even *attempting* to explain why they call it the blues]

🎵 “And I guess that's why they call it the blues…”

[Adam @adambombpgh]

@ourpunkkoala 👊

[Adam @adambombpgh]

Pronouncing semester like scenester to own the profs.

[Adam @adambombpgh]

me: on a sloop just chilling

the poor cook: taking and eating up ALL of my corn

[Adam @adambombpgh]

Domhnall Gleeson eating a banh mi.*

*This tweet brought to you by my brain

[Adam @adambombpgh]

Motion to rename dog-eared pages “Scottish folds.”

[Adam @adambombpgh]

[To the tune of My Cherie Amour]
🎵”Dry cherryyy liqueur...”
“Hi, this is Stevie Wonder for Luxardo maraschino...”

[Adam @adambombpgh]

*Power-walks up to bar like Vince McMahon, tapping empty glass*
“Three fingers of Sprite, hold the ice”

[Adam @adambombpgh]

To paraphrase the great Donald Rumsfeld, you try on pants with the waist you have, not the waist you might want or wish to have at a later time.

[Adam @adambombpgh]

@lewbryson Baby Saz, 6 years old: $27.99

(Seriously, spotted - and snagged - two bottles today at PLCB 0247. Hadn’t seen it in PA in years and it’s not even in the online database)

[Adam @adambombpgh]

@MaggiesFarmRum Congrats, guys!

[Adam @adambombpgh]

@jagoffbrewer @EastEndBrewing Meanwhile bars, i.e., producers' customers, have to pay $85-90k for the privilege of doing what producers do essentially for free, and have no right to open satellite locations (ahem, "storage facilities") outside of the quota system and license marketplace. Grass always greener.

[Adam @adambombpgh]

We made a thing. You should come. https://t.co/cly9EHiCEa

[Lorelei @LoreleiPGH]

Friends: we are proud to announce the *Grand Opening* of Lorelei this Fri 7/27 & Sat 7/28. Tapping fresh, unfiltered gravity kegs both days, with music by @DJMBPGH on Fri and a noon opening on Sat. Prost! #eastliberty

[Adam @adambombpgh]

2018: when fast-food joints display their menus on walls of flat-screen tv's while fancy joints display their menus on pizzeria-style letterboards.

[Adam @adambombpgh]

DID YOU KNOW?: If you pull on the locked door of a closed establishment while looking directly at the sign indicating that it is closed, the door magically opens - just for you.

[Adam @adambombpgh]

Housekeys: making absolutely terrible box cutters since 1778.

[Megan Amram @meganamram]

mr. gorbachev, tear up this ass

[Adam @adambombpgh]

Legs fell asleep on the john and now I'm staggering around like Jim Delos post-cognitive plateau.

[Adam @adambombpgh]

Nothing on Planet Earth is as bad at its job as an HP printer.

[Adam @adambombpgh]

Ten months later, this remains a criminally underliked tweet.