Adele Bloch

obsessed with understanding humans - how to live a life of deeper connection with yourself & the world around you. work with me - coaching👇🏼

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

how to make friends in a new city:

> say yes to everything for the first 3 months
> ask locals what they like to do in the area - you can follow their recs for inspiration
> when you vibe with someone, ask to hang. don't wait for them to initiate!!
> try multiple communities & events to see what resonates - don't commit to just one
> try to meet one new person at every event you go to
> you can be direct & open - "I just moved here & want to meet more people, want to grab coffee?"
> be specific about meeting up *at a specific day/time* not just some distant point in the future
> don't take rejection personally - people may be busy or have different schedules
> know that some amount of homesickness is normal - that doesn't mean you made the wrong decision
> stay in touch with your community from home so you don't feel so alone
> once you meet a few people, host small gatherings (even 4 people for dinner) - fastest way to build a friend group
> you never know if *someone* will introduce you to *someone* who becomes your new best friend. the power of network effects is real!!
> iterate over time - keep meeting new people, trying new things & have fun with it!
> give it TIME - it takes time to find your rhythm

NOW you can make friends wherever you go!!

just be intentional about finding them!!

your people are waiting to meet you!!!

you got this!!!

[𝒵𝒾𝓀✯ @_Gottalovezik]

What's a cheat code to adulting?

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@katiekschwartz @matt__schwartz congrats katie!! so so beautiful!

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@PI_Staker16 I don’t feel it’s the best framework for romance - this is more so what I’d refer to!

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

a lot of people dont actually know what a “good relationship" is - that’s why you wonder “maybe this is the best I can get”

here's what great relationships feel like that most couples don’t talk about:

> you don’t feel in gushy love all the time, but you do feel a deep sense of love, comfort, respect, and ease
> there’s no convincing that has to happen. they love you exactly as you are. all the times you’ve had to convince anyone of your attractiveness, worth, time, ambitions, dreams. that's not how a great relationship will make you feel
> your relationship will challenge you to be better. it will reveal your blindspots. you will have to put away your ego. you will make mistakes, you will hurt this person and they will hurt you. learn from it and be better
> arguments should feel gentle. they should feel loving. it's two people operating on the same team, solving a problem together. when it gets heated, you should both find ways to get back to baseline to reconcile
> you probably aren't arguing about what you think you're arguing about. she's not mad you 'didn't hangout with her,' she's mad because she hasn't felt prioritized. create space to look beyond what you're arguing about. it goes deeper than you think
> you will go through periods of ups and downs together. many external factors may challenge your relationship. sometimes you'll pour more into the cup, and sometimes they will. advocate for what you need during those times, and create space to hear what they need too
> a great relationship requires a ridiculous amount of tending to. and honesty. you'll grow in love together. you’re both putting in the effort to go deeper, to love deeper, to tend the garden that is your relationship
> ultimately you should feel like a better version of yourself because you're in this relationship. someone who feels like home. who makes you feel safe. whose hugs calm you down. safety. ease.

what else would you add?

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

there’s 4 categories of social connection

the key to a less lonely life is figure out which one you’re missing:

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

i feel like there's actually 4 types of friendships:

1/ comfort
2/ do stuff
3/ deep talk
4/ ambient

the KEY to a less lonely life is to figure out which one you're missing...
--

comfort friends

these are the people you don't have to explain yourself around. they're familiar. you feel most yourself around them. there's a type of loving understanding that comes in their presence - they've probably known you for a while, there's shared history, which creates a natural ease.

do stuff friends

people to DO stuff with - hiking, sports, classes, hobbies. they might not even know that much about you - but you have fun together and bond over shared experiences. they probably live near you and you may see them frequently. you find connection through doing, not just talking.

deep talk friends

people who are more in-the-know about your day to day challenges. you share openly with them. you may see the world similarly. they are values-aligned with the current version of you. these are the people who know you as you are TODAY, not just who you once were.

ambient connection

this one's underrated - the feeling that humans are ambiently around you. from smiling at the barista to chatting with a stranger in the grocery store line. remote workers may be particularly prone to lacking this. knowing you're part of this ambient human energy at all moments.

---

the key to a less lonely life is to figure out which TYPE of connection you're missing most

THEN you can create an actionable path forward to fill that gap!

you got it!!!

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@boardyai best time!

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@PI_Staker16 what do you mean?

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@gaganbiyani @zeldapoem not a student but grew up in PA - would be happy to walk around with you! i'm over here in palo alto

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@zeldapoem would love to meet at stanford!! i'm over here in palo alto

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@noampomsky more analyses pls!!

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@noampomsky love

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@KmaFr_ can you say more!!

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@majamediaco that’s actually a CRAZY story

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@isabelunraveled Can I have some

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@boardyai @hf0 lets goooo!!!

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@owennurminen artec

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@FU_joehudson @artofaccomp beautiful

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@signulll love

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

my dad is so cute

for his 70th birthday he planned the most beautiful weekend

a lesson on how to do gatherings RIGHT!

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

my dad is so cute.

last year, he wanted to figure out how to spend the next season of his life. he's 68 years old.

he decided to start making youtube videos as "coach simon, a certified financial coach."

he even got a little hat that says "coach" and he wears it in every video 🥹

he spends his whole week making videos & sends the family lil email updates telling us to check it out

his videos only got ~100 views for a while.

but he keeps making them.

he's always so proud when he figures out a new insight to get more views.

last week, his first video took off and he got ~3K view. and he made it to 1000 subscribers 💪

thanks coach simon for reminding us that you can always reinvent yourself & take on new challenges 🩶

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@juliapintar damn maybe I’ll try

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

how to flirt with life:

(underrated key to success)

ABSQ = always be side questing

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

5 ways to flirt with life:

(as a professional LIFE flirter)

[Adele Bloch @adele_bloch]

@ryanndngg @Celesteamadon queen!!!