@bellaagunz@BAH_FLAG_PINS I tried to send you a DM, but because I’m not verified it won’t let me message you to find out some more information. Is there another way to contact you to find out more as a current homeschooling mother in New Jersey?
I was ready to release a friend of mine after not hearing from him for months. This was following the last time I contacted him and did not receive a response. He didn’t reach out for my birthday and I was really done at that point — until I started receiving intuitive nudges and an epiphany that something wasn’t right. This was someone I engaged with pretty frequently for a few years, so deep down inside, I knew something was off.
Spirit guided me to log onto Instagram after a few weeks of being inactive to check for any online activity of his. The first message I see is from his brother (sent just the previous night) informing me he was institutionalized for a few months after experiencing a severe mental psychosis episode, and that he had lost his phone and all personal belongings. His brother then passed on the hospital’s information so that I could call him.
When I tell you receiving that news brought my heart so much ease. I cried in relief — not because of what he was navigating, but just from hearing his voice, knowing that he was alive, stable, and healing. My guy was being held on suicide watch while I was struggling with all sorts of assumptions and feelings of abandonment. I genuinely felt that I was ghosted out of nowhere, at first.
I couldn’t help but to feel waves of guilt instantly wash over me for thinking negatively about his absence and silence at all. This was heavy and shocking to receive, especially because he was the very last person on Earth I’d ever expect this from.
I share this to say: no matter how familiar you are with your people, everyone carries hidden pain and wounds. You never truly know what someone is going through and the battles they face. Don’t make it about you. Just extend love, compassion, and grace, always.
Social media metrics have ruined people’s concept of scale….. 1000 people is a lot…. 300 people paying $2 for a pdf of your poetry is a lot… 30 people wouldn’t even fit into most cafes…… Don’t forget… how big each person is….
i want to hug all previous versions of myself for the unwavering commitment towards leading me here. my heart is always so soft when i think about younger me because that little human being was so brave.
I made a speed bump in my life a stop sign but somewhere in there I got back into the car and started driving.
I don’t remember starting the car but it’s nice seeing things past me by.