quando começo a chorar por estresse, mas na verdade tô chorando porque me sinto sozinha, porque sinto que nada que eu faço é o bastante, porque tô cansada, exausta, sem rumo e principalmente sem ânimo
rest in peace my baby boy. oh, how I’ve loved you so. I regret not providing you a better life. but those are unavoidable feelings of a parent isn’t it? I hope you are at peace, and thank you for anchoring me in my darkest times. I am forever grateful.
I don’t have what it takes to survive what I’ve been put on trial for. and imagine how terrifying that is, for a young little girl . knowing that there was only one path for her to walk. and it was to hell.
when my head gets fuzzy, and I revert back 6 years, I can only focus on getting enough oxygen in my lungs to make it to the next minute. and then I relive the next 6 years over again, and I remember all the bad, and the good. and when it’s good it’s good. but I wish it was enough
but now that im older, i know more and feel more, and in a way it’s muted some of those reminiscent stronger emotions within me. I wish the good was good enough. but im reminded that i dont have what it takes to survive in this world.