My bitch girlfriend broke up with me just because I have eczema and athlete’s foot and ringworm and jaundice and plaque psoriasis and scabies and pinkeye and diabetic thrush and diphtheria and whooping cough and jock itch and leprosy
not to be repulsive or anything, and i don't want this at all to come off as predatory in nature, but what's the point in doing anything if i can't have chewy chips ahoy.
when i’m on the phone with my girlfriend and i don’t know what to say i just repeat her name in various tones of voice and it makes her giggle so i think i have this whole “relationship” thing solved