Not That Dario

This is a @timpayne__ fan account

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

@JakeHatch The appellate process is 9-12 months, so the local judge basically decided the case

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

@Billgetzfroggy As promised “…they shall ball and not be weary, they shall dunk and not faint”

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

@BYUSportsNation Danny and Austin have traded down more than up. I don’t think they will ever trade up

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

@TabbClements https://t.co/szUCLIdLtq

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

Este Brasil parece un chasquibum, no asusta a nadie…

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

@heynavtoor @Ben_Aguero do you hate it yet? Or does it happen after graduation?

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

@LukeFHan Thought of you @hgdolder

[David Ondrej @DavidOndrej1]

https://t.co/D3dIbkTTUK

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

@ZachLowe_NBA The 2020-2021 Jazz proved you cannot win in the playoffs with 2 undersized guards. About time the cavs realize that…

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

@Matt_Pinner All 20 🙋‍♂️

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

@ReturnOfKappy This is a known pass from Argentina to Chile

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

@TraductorTeAma Por lo menos tienen forma anatómica 🌽🍑

[FIFA World Cup @FIFAWorldCup]

⏮️ Three years ago today…

🇦🇷🇫🇷 The best #FIFAWorldCup final ever?

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

Sounds about right? @hgdolder

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

Last quarter I rolled out Microsoft Copilot to 4,000 employees.

$30 per seat per month.

$1.4 million annually.

I called it "digital transformation."

The board loved that phrase.

They approved it in eleven minutes.

No one asked what it would actually do.

Including me.

I told everyone it would "10x productivity."

That's not a real number.

But it sounds like one.

HR asked how we'd measure the 10x.

I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards."

They stopped asking.

Three months later I checked the usage reports.

47 people had opened it.

12 had used it more than once.

One of them was me.

I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds.

It took 45 seconds.

Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations.

But I called it a "pilot success."

Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail.

The CFO asked about ROI.

I showed him a graph.

The graph went up and to the right.

It measured "AI enablement."

I made that metric up.

He nodded approvingly.

We're "AI-enabled" now.

I don't know what that means.

But it's in our investor deck.

A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT.

I said we needed "enterprise-grade security."

He asked what that meant.

I said "compliance."

He asked which compliance.

I said "all of them."

He looked skeptical.

I scheduled him for a "career development conversation."

He stopped asking questions.

Microsoft sent a case study team.

They wanted to feature us as a success story.

I told them we "saved 40,000 hours."

I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up.

They didn't verify it.

They never do.

Now we're on Microsoft's website.

"Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot."

The CEO shared it on LinkedIn.

He got 3,000 likes.

He's never used Copilot.

None of the executives have.

We have an exemption.

"Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction."

I wrote that policy.

The licenses renew next month.

I'm requesting an expansion.

5,000 more seats.

We haven't used the first 4,000.

But this time we'll "drive adoption."

Adoption means mandatory training.

Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches.

But completion will be tracked.

Completion is a metric.

Metrics go in dashboards.

Dashboards go in board presentations.

Board presentations get me promoted.

I'll be SVP by Q3.

I still don't know what Copilot does.

But I know what it's for.

It's for showing we're "investing in AI."

Investment means spending.

Spending means commitment.

Commitment means we're serious about the future.

The future is whatever I say it is.

As long as the graph goes up and to the right.

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

@jcarlos2001 @Ben_Aguero show your gf this 😂

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

Ref working hard for the utes, we feel your pain @jaylassoku

[Sudanalytics @sudanalytics_]

El gol más estético que vas a ver.

Hoy, hace tres años. 🇦🇷🚬

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

🫣🥹

[Not That Dario @aguerodc]

Feliz día para los que festejan

[Modo Scaloneta 🇦🇷🏆 @ModoScaloneta]

“El gol que más disfruté en Qatar fue el de México. No por la gente ni mucho menos. Fue un desahogo muy grande y nos daba la tranquilidad de volver a ser lo que éramos y depender de nosotros”.

Firma: Lionel Messi, en Simplemente Fútbol.

🇦🇷🥹