𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢

ghost writer of some tweets. occasionally funny. always embarrassing. disco rules.

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

tweeting so I can pin this calming video of my beauty queen, please enjoy

[Rachel Karten @milkkarten]

THE LINK IN BIO JOB BOARD IS BACK! Whether you’re seeking a new social media role or recruiting for a talented social employee—this job board is for you. It’s got an improved look and lots of exciting jobs (YETI! J.Crew! Tarte!). Every single role on it has been handpicked by me.

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

everybody stop and look at this dog's tongue

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

@timmyf BMI being *the* determinant for obese and morbidly obese is ridiculous. According to my BMI, I am morbidly obese. I’m also lifting a ton and have more muscle than I’ve ever had. It’s oversimplified and not an accurate standalone measure of health.

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

v boring vacation photos, they all just look like this

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

coming back from vacation and giving yourself an extra day off to readjust is the life hack of all life hacks

[Soren Iverson @soren_iverson]

LinkedIn option to dispute someone's skills

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

when I was a kid, I thought "apropos" was short for "appropriate"

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

@brandonCltBeer https://t.co/QZxWd3NN4S

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

first a seinfeld reboot announced, now this 🤔

[Wale @Wale]

My silence has been golden... see you on Friday. Folarin back .

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

the best social networks of all time continue to be

1. tumblr
2. DMing on Spotify (RIP)

[Hind Makki @HindMakki]

Please Support the Family of Our Departed Angel, Wadea Al-Fayoume, for his funeral and his mother's hospital costs https://t.co/3bOJocl4jU

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

I called to cancel a facial, left a message. they texted me back to confirm. I am the bad millennial that forgets -most- folks these days would prefer I stop calling them

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

@NoahMallin So sorry to hear that, Noah.

[@ayakatally.bsky.social @AYakatally]

How I feel after adding drop shadows to my slides:

[Intuit Mailchimp @Mailchimp]

When marketing meets mindfulness, working happier and healthier comes naturally.

This #WorldMentalHealthDay, we invite you to check out Invisible Tools, a video series exploring helpful techniques for prioritizing your mental health at work, in partnership with @HeadspaceWhen marketing meets mindfulness, working happier and healthier comes naturally.

This #WorldMentalHealthDay, we invite you to check out Invisible Tools, a video series exploring helpful techniques for prioritizing your mental health at work, in partnership with @HeadspaceWhen marketing meets mindfulness, working happier and healthier comes naturally.

This #WorldMentalHealthDay, we invite you to check out Invisible Tools, a video series exploring helpful techniques for prioritizing your mental health at work, in partnership with @HeadspaceWhen marketing meets mindfulness, working happier and healthier comes naturally.

This #WorldMentalHealthDay, we invite you to check out Invisible Tools, a video series exploring helpful techniques for prioritizing your mental health at work, in partnership with @HeadspaceWhen marketing meets mindfulness, working happier and healthier comes naturally.

This #WorldMentalHealthDay, we invite you to check out Invisible Tools, a video series exploring helpful techniques for prioritizing your mental health at work, in partnership with @HeadspaceWhen marketing meets mindfulness, working happier and healthier comes naturally.

This #WorldMentalHealthDay, we invite you to check out Invisible Tools, a video series exploring helpful techniques for prioritizing your mental health at work, in partnership with @Headspace.

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

had c*vid a week ago! did my previous PR for reps today! earnest tweet allowed!!

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

@wadewhatwhy oh my god!!

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

cheated on my dogter today

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

@MelanieCrissey I feel like that makes it cheesier! or…embarrassing?

[𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢 @ahvance]

some things aren’t “cringe” they’re “cheesy” and we should be better about distinguishing between the two