Supes

Follands. Saints. Roller. GK

[CJ @FlynnJonas2]

Boro fans…

Pompey fans…

Coventry fans…

Or fans or any other club…

Bring it on, we deserve it…

But let me just say NO ONE can

Hurt Me

Break Me

Disappoint Me

As much as my own Club 🫡👍🏻

#SaintsFC

[Saint Alastair @Saint_Alastair]

Don’t suppose there is any chance they’d let us off with a cheating awareness course? #saintsfc

[The Hurlock Report @HurlockReport]

#SaintsFC delivered a performance of such serene, almost patronising excellence in their 3-0 win over former Premier League champions Blackburn Rovers that at times it felt less like a football match and more like a live demonstration.

Saints were slick, composed, and in complete control from the first whistle, they moved the ball with the kind of casual authority normally reserved for adults playing keep-ball against an overenthusiastic toddler. Blackburn, by contrast, spent most of the evening chasing shadows and occasionally their own sense of purpose.

At the heart of it all was man of the match Cameron Archer, who combined sharp movement, intelligent finishing and the general air of someone who had realised about 20 minutes in that this was going to be quite an easy night. His performance was described by one fan as “borderline unfair” and by another as “the footballing equivalent of bringing a Labrador to a chess match and still winning.”

Goalkeeper Daniel Peretz endured the worst of it, reportedly becoming so bored midway through the first half that he pulled out his phone and began playing Block Blast, occasionally glancing up to confirm that nothing whatsoever was happening.

“I got to level 73,” said Peretz afterwards. “There was a moment where I thought I might have to make a save, but it turned out to be a Blackburn player passing it directly out of play, so I went back to clearing coloured blocks.”

The evening’s standout moment, however, came courtesy of Leo Scienza, who added a touch of slapstick to proceedings by colliding at full speed with a corner post and snapping it clean in half. Play was delayed while officials replaced the stricken equipment and checked whether Scienza himself required reassembly.

“It just came out of nowhere,” said a stunned steward. “One minute it was a perfectly good corner flag, the next it was kindling.”

With the game effectively over by half-time and the crowd audibly drifting into a state of mild hibernation, Saints decided to inject some entertainment by resurrecting the ghost of former manager Russell Martin. Players began fannying around at the back with increasing recklessness, exchanging five-yard passes under imaginary pressure in a nostalgic tribute to the tactical philosophy nobody asked for.

“At one point we deliberately passed it across our own six-yard box four times just to see if anyone would react,” admitted Jack Stephens. “A bloke in Row G sighed quite loudly, so we knew we were onto something.”

“We wanted to give the fans something different,” explained one defender. “A bit of jeopardy. A bit of nostalgia. Mostly jeopardy for us, but still.”

Blackburn did have a fleeting opportunity to capitalise on this self-inflicted chaos, but declined with the air of a team that had already accepted their role in the evening as “polite observers.”

By full-time, Saints had not only secured three points but also demonstrated that they can be both devastatingly effective and mildly bored at the same time – a rare and impressive combination.

Southampton now move on with three points, a clean sheet, and Daniel Peretz just one level away from a new personal best.

[Supes @ajsuper10]

@LegacySiu Kane

[Sam Fender @samfendermusic]

Thank you everyone. Lost for words 🤯❤️

[Supes @ajsuper10]

@BahlestKimmie @footballfights Out of bounds 😂

[Supes @ajsuper10]

@90sfootball Kasami

[Supes @ajsuper10]

@Utdjacobi_ Bergkamp

[Supes @ajsuper10]

@Stocky_1984 Nice one Stocks, congratulations mate xx

[Supes @ajsuper10]

@LynnHayter @1PercentClubITV Mass is in the middle of the word night. Mid-night mass

[Supes @ajsuper10]

@thebiguglyone @1PercentClubITV Eighteen

[Supes @ajsuper10]

@mattbrennan88 @paddypower

[The 1% Club @1PercentClubITV]

Been giving away books this morning. Lots more still to give away.
All you got to do is repost this and we will select more people to get one.
You can also buy one with this link if you want...
https://t.co/YiHmwgwGEb
#the1percentclub #quizbook #Giveaway

[Jack @jkanalysis7]

This makes Jeff Stelling an even bigger 🐐, he used to make it look so easy.

Used to sit there as a kid thinking I’d like to be in that role, but now I think otherwise, some effort they go through.

Gillette Soccer Saturday will always be the best show on a Saturday.

[Supes @ajsuper10]

@historyrock_ Tell her about it

[Supes @ajsuper10]

@SpursSimpsons @SpursOfficial Grow up you fucking cunt

[Supes @ajsuper10]

@JoshSeefried Bellend

[A Funny Old Game @sid_lambert]

It’s the anniversary of one of the Greatest Premier League Goals Of All Time.

Pajtim Kasami. Selhurst Park. 2013.

Unbelievable. What is he even thinking?

[Supes @ajsuper10]

@Raymond82310289 Grow up you fucking helmet

[The Magic Mod @TaylorMod]

One of the best songs ever written from one of the best albums ever made

Facts