i 💙 baby corn

she/her/hers. resting simp face. actually a lizard in a human suit. nathan fielder stan. header courtesy of @cemora_the_vro

[NeoHana 🪿 @_NeoHana_]

IT'S BEEN 24 YEARS BUT I HAVE FINALLY BEEN VINDICATED

NO LONGER AM I THE ONE BLAMED FOR SETTING THE FAMILY LAPTOP ON FIRE IN 2002

MY DAD HAS ADMITTED THAT IT WAS HIS FAULT

NO LONGER WAS MY 30 MINUTES OF NEOPETS GAMING THE CAUSE OF IT CATCHING FIRE!

[i 💙 baby corn @al_______marie]

AM I THAT PREDICTABLE

[Ron Iver @ronnui_]

Coffee seems so romantic in other countries. The serenity of sipping on a cafe au lait on the scenic promenade of Versailles. Not here. Not where I'm from. At home I'm driving through the wall of a Dunkin and I'm drinking my dump juice at 70mph on the freeway.

[Mike F @DeputyWarlock]

reflecting on the time i was peeling the bark off a tree during 2nd grade recess and the principal asked "how would you feel if i peeled your skin off?" crazy thing to say to a child but i gotta hand it to her it stuck

[mr online @Absolunar]

gn

[i like food @messedupfoods]

︎ ︎ ︎

[evan loves worf @esjesjesj]

Can a Trump supporter explain why this is necessary without sounding like an utter sociopath

[vo @vanillaopinions]

happy ronald reagan death day to all who celebrate

[Fred Delicious 🍆 @Fred_Delicious]

this is like kendrick vs drake but with two drakes