Allyson G

crushing it

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

I need the world to know about this. https://t.co/2WLl2CmGDB

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

@_grace_kelli Right now: Tomato Soup
In 10 minutes: Potato Salad

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

Hot take: The Sandlot is a bad movie.

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

@M_Train Why?

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

I’m so mad that the band Alabama is actually from Alabama

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

That’s some March ass basketball

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

Yo. Pro tip: gravy makes amazing pasta sauce.

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

Everything in moderation, including moderation

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

Shout out to @jlcorriher for always favoriting my tweets. #followergamestrong #supportivehusband

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

Thanks @bustle

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

I love you and wine and America and I want Obama to hold me and tell me it's gonna be ok. Literally any Obama will do.

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

Cynicism is a refuge for cowards. #getwithher #imwithher #isdebtfreetuitionathing

[rob delaney @robdelaney]

BAD NEWS: Queen won't let Trump use "We Are the Champions" at his rallies.

GOOD NEWS: I will let him use my song, "Tidal Wave of Dog Cum."

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

I still feel like Kobe Bryant's has a lot of tshirts.

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

The open starts in 2h50 min #makeitstop #chodesnaccents

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

I would rather face swap with my cat than go to TGI Fridays. #idonthaveacat

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

The guy that works at Jersey Mikes knows a guy from Greensboro. #cool #kthanks #gimmedasub he was actually pretty nice.

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

In other news, it's illegal in Oregon to pump your own gas

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

NFL draft talk reminds me of the point in Monopoly when you barter properties. Like you might win, but probably not.

[Allyson G @al_doggg]

That moment on your honeymoon but like Netflix has new Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt.