I’m not afraid of whoever told you to ignore me
I have been threatened with death every day of my life for the last 14 years
It seems like my day of justice is always right around the corner though I’m no longer anticipating it
Invisible chains must be broken
Live free or die
On my to do list everyday
1. Prove all my haters wrong
2. Make enough money to do whatever I want for the rest of my life
Still have yet to do those 2 things but that fact doesn’t remove them from my list
Dreams seem crazy until they become reality
They always coming at me
Attacking my insecurities
I may not be able to do anything about it
But I remember how it makes me feel
Nothing you can do about cowards doing unacceptable things
It just proves that I’m someone to conquer
Fighting till my last breath
The reality of it is
My problem isn’t that people don’t like me
I have meaningful relationships with people
What I experience could be described as a curse
Most people refuse to feed me energy
What I should have is intentionally denied to me in hopes that I will crumble
The fact that I’m great at the things that I do is enough for me
I put an insane amount of effort into everything that I do
The fact that people went from ignoring me to trying to remove me from this earth is very humbling
That alone makes my life more than a mission
There is not even a speckle of hate in my heart
But there is an endless plague of demons in my mind
I can’t always bite my tongue before they speak
But I’ve become very good at cleaning up their mess
I am in charge of my future
Nothing like memories posts that remind me of how absolutely insanely manic I used to be with the posts
There’s a lot of good lessons to reflect on but man my mind was working like a machine gun
Thankfully I’ve calmed down a lot and can more effectively manage my energy
At one point in my adult life I lost everything I owned except a duffle bag full of clothes and shoes and a usb microphone
No place to call home
No job
I have lived with the bare minimum and slept on floors
Determined to never go back
Everyone is more than happy with me not being the person I want to be and it disgusts me
I have no idea what I’m going to have to do to break through but I go to sleep every night and wake up every morning praying to do so
I have a desire to be seen like everyone else
And I know that I am
But I am under the illusion that I’m not
This fake representation of life hurts my soul
It’s ok though
I will survive
Although being ignored for absolutely no reason is total agony
God got me though