alan

Just on here to free my random thoughts from my weird mind 😜

[alan @alan42175805]

@europa THIS explains why @maxrushden is the way he is! Always wondered 🤔

[alan @alan42175805]

@soran0312_ 16

[alan @alan42175805]

@BigTomD many people would probably say @RomeshRang has sold out after watching that BBC TV licence glorification. Tbh I think I would agree 😒

[alan @alan42175805]

@Herring1967 got a new emergency question for ya for free. ‘Have you ever seen shit coming out of your own arse?’ You’re welcome 😇

[alan @alan42175805]

@KFC_UKI why the hell have you not had any burgers with bacon on them for YEARS! The bacon ones are best! ESPECIALLY THE DOUBLE DOWN!!!! Bring bacon back man!!!! 🥓 🥓 🥓

[alan @alan42175805]

@narindertweets My 1st thought was ‘she’s got a husband?!!!’ 🫤 Then when I got over that shocker I thought I suppose he’s doing what he can do to numb the pain and embarrassment of being married to you 🤣

[alan @alan42175805]

@TVKev @JournoDevs @PeterBleksley @SamaramGill @mrstevenallen @danwootton Actually now wondering is @danwootton in on it 🤔

[alan @alan42175805]

@TVKev @JournoDevs @PeterBleksley @SamaramGill @mrstevenallen After watching @danwootton I was gonna come on ere and say I bet this isn’t a real rift and they’re both probably sitting with a vino laughing their heads off at more gullible people who believe it. Turns out @TVKev has already done that! Catch up @danwootton 🤣 🤣 🤣

[alan @alan42175805]

@narindertweets I can’t work out if you really believe all that toxic BS that comes outta your mouth or you’re just desperate for attention. Actually, now that I think of it, it’s probably a bit of both 🤔

[alan @alan42175805]

I kept wondering why I broke out in hives every time I entered a university so I went to my doctor. ………

Turns out I’m allergic to academia nuts 🥜

[alan @alan42175805]

I wish I could series link just the ‘payment days’ in Four in a Bed

[alan @alan42175805]

I do about 2000 steps more per day than I should because I forget stuff 😩

[alan @alan42175805]

I think it’s fair to say that I do a lot of straddling in my life. Don’t we all? 🤔

[alan @alan42175805]

Has @DerrenBrown Derren Browned us all into believing Derren Brown is now a verb ??? 🤔

[alan @alan42175805]

@PatrickChristys How do you distribute the money to those in need? My mother just got a letter confirming she will not get the cold weather payment as she is literally just above the threshold 😤

[alan @alan42175805]

Just watching #mafsnewzealand and wondering if Madeleine’s mum will be called a racist for her comments on a potential grandchild 🤔Obviously she shouldn’t but we all know how some people can get easily offended these days! 😞

[alan @alan42175805]

Does anyone let a microwave burger ‘stand’ for one minute when they reheat it?

[alan @alan42175805]

@GBNEWS I LOVE Headliners! Just wondering though, has there ever been an episode when @LewisSchaffer didn’t get a mention? He obviously means a lot to the other hosts/panelists and I would personally love to see him on every night!

[alan @alan42175805]

@tSHandJ COCKTAIL SAUSAGES!!! 😋 🤤 😋

[alan @alan42175805]

@GaryLineker It’s hardly a new thing is it? Been going on since the dawn of time and will be going on long after we’re all gone no matter how many stupid tweets you spew out 🤔