AlanParcels

No I don’t deliver

[AlanParcels @AlanParcels]

Anyone want to donate their period blood? Trying to make black pudding.
#goodeats

[AlanParcels @AlanParcels]

Butterfly chrysalis in my house pupated today like a metapod evolving into butterfree. I’ve called him Charlie B. Kirk. The B stands for Butterfreedom in honour of the fallen. Happy Kirkaversary everyone. #charliekirk #kirkaversary #pokemon

[AlanParcels @AlanParcels]

@bartsimplton I quite like my thumbs, so I’m adverse to the idea unfortunately.

[AlanParcels @AlanParcels]

@bartsimplton @clayclayyclayyy Me when I go to Nando’s

[AlanParcels @AlanParcels]

Went to the doctors today because it burned when I peed. The doctor gave me a pisscription #joke

[AlanParcels @AlanParcels]

Why are the characters in league of legends called champions and not legends? Are Riot Games stupid?

[AlanParcels @AlanParcels]

@teracotapi Yessssss @RockstarGames will we be able to jeet each other on GTA 6 online?

[AlanParcels @AlanParcels]

Why is Peter Griffin buff but Homer Sipson fat and in his underwear? @Fortnite explain

[AlanParcels @AlanParcels]

Squad status update - Refining my poached egg skills

[BigButtPear PHD MD 110 IQ 5'10" BMI: 18.5 @BigPearButt]

Just realized I was submitting Job applications with this as my pfp

[The Pets 𝕏 @ThePetsX]

This video kills me everytime 😭

[AlanParcels @AlanParcels]

This Twitter stuff is hard!!! @daredviscorpse help me out bro

[AlanParcels @AlanParcels]

Famly Guy!!!